RELEVANT CHILDREN'S MINISTRY

Kids are a big determining factor when it comes to picking a church to attend. 

Parents can visit a church and like it, but if their child doesn't like it, they won't be coming back.  

Studies show that people pick a church based on 2 reasons.

1. How friendly are you?

2. What do you have to offer my child?

That being said, let's talk about 5 big reasons why kids pick a church to attend. 

1. They either have a friend that already attends or they make some new friends on their first or second visit.  Kids are just like adults.  It's all about relationships.  If they don't make friends with someone, they will feel lonely and not want to return.

Here are some practical ways you can help kids make friends at your church:

Be intentional about helping guests find a friend.

Introduce guests to other children that are their age.

Do icebreakers and other relational activities that help kids connect.

Train some children to be "guests' hosts."  Their ministry is to stay with guests for the entire time and get to know them.  This is a great way for children to serve and reach others. 

2. The lessons are engaging.. If you want children to pick your church, then present engaging lessons. Learn how to capture kids' attention and get them involved in the lesson.  Here are great tips on how to do this:

How to be a Captivating Storyteller for Kids

Gen Alpha...What They Like and Connect With 

Welcome Gen Alpha

When parents come to pick up their children, 9 times out of 10 you will hear them ask this one question.

"Did you have fun today?"

What are parents asking their child by referring to the service, class, etc. as fun?  They are asking if it was relevant?  They are asking if it was engaging?  They are asking if the child learned anything?  They are asking if they want to come back?

3. There is a teacher, small group leader, volunteer, etc. that takes an interest in them and shows them kindness and care. 

As you read through these 5 reasons, you will notice that I did not include buildings or facilities. While it is great to have a cool children's ministry space, that is not the primary reason kids want to come back.  

The number one reason they will return is because they heard someone call their name.  They had someone who listened to their prayer requests and prayed for them.  They had someone who genuinely showed they cared about them and took interest in them as a person.

I love this quote by Walt Disney.  He said this right before he opened Disneyland in California.  

You can design and create, and build the most wonderful place in the world. But it takes people to make the dream a reality.

As you think about this, here are some questions to ask:

How are our ratios?  Are our current ratios able to accommodate individual attention?  

Do we have a prayer time in the lesson where kids can share prayer requests and be prayed for by name?

Are we sending follow-up postcards, letters, etc. that are handwritten and addressed to the guests by name?

4. They feel safe in your care.  Today's kids are growing up knowing they and their world can be attacked at any time.  Terrorists.  Kidnappers.  Bullies.  Bombs.  Shooters.  

And remember...being at a church is no guarantee you won't be attacked. We realize this after seeing many shootings that have taken place at a church.  Even in a small, country church like the one in Texas where 26 people were killed.  

The safety measures you have in place to protect children are so important. Kids and parents may not say anything about this up front, but it is a concern that you must address.  Share with them the measures you take to keep kids safe in your care. 

5. They didn't hear a lot of ssssshhhhhhsssss.  The leaders know that kids learn best by dialogue instead of monologue.  Kids are encouraged to get involved by talking, using their learning styles, laughing, engaging in hands on learning and lots of opporutunties to move and just be a kid instead of being forced to "sit still and be quiet."

You are surrounded by children and parents in your community that don't know Jesus.  Let's go all out to reach them with the Gospel.  To see this happen, your church must become a place where children are welcome and children's ministry is a top priority.  

God may be calling you to be the person who grasps this and helps your church live it out.

Ahhhh, yes.  Bouncy houses.  If you are in kids' ministry, you know all about them.  

Bouncy houses (or whatever you call them) have been a staple in kids' ministry over the years.  And rightly so...kids love them...and so do parents who are looking for ways to help their kids burn off some energy.  

On any given day, you'll find them at birthday parties, church events and other special occasions for kids and families.

Bounceland, a company near Chicago that imports inflatables from China, sold more than 12,000 bounce houses between March and June, up 350% from last year. 

And due to the virus, sales of these large, outdoors toys on Amazon have increased by 50% this summer.  Inflatable water slides are big sellers as they provide kids and parents a way to "beat the heat."   The nationwide top seller has been Little Tikes Jump ’n Slide inflatable bounce house, available for $270 on Amazon.

Many parents are also purchasing bouncy houses for stress relief as they try to find something to entertain the kiddos who are now home a lot more.

So why do kids love bouncy houses so much?  

Obviously, one reason is because it gives them the opportunity to move, move, move.  You can jump, bounce and fly through the air with "the greatest of ease."  

But if you look a little deeper, you'll also see that bouncy houses represent something about this special moment in time that other yard toys don’t. Inside the bounce house you are safe.  The floor filled with air will catch you when you fall.  Plus, you can have a rule that no one outside of your own family can come in without first being checked for signs of the virus.

If you rent bouncy houses quite often, it is worth checking to see how much it would be to buy a few of them.  They will quickly pay for themselves as you use them for church activities and events. 

And bouncy houses have evolved into a variety of options.  You can buy a super hero inflatable...a giant, wild water slide...a castle...a sports themed bouncy house...an obstacle course inflatable...and on we could go.  There's a wide variety of bouncy houses for kids to have fun in.

They are also a great outreach tool.  Set them up anywhere and you'll find kids and parents eager to connect with you for some free bounce time.  

Your turn.  

Do you use bounce houses in your ministry (pre-virus days)? 

How have you used inflatables for outreach?  

Do you own or rent?

Share your thoughts, ideas and insight in the comment section below. 

Happy bouncing! 

This is the first time I have ever written about homeschooling.  One thing that prompted me to write this article is the current situation we find ourselves in due to COVID-19.  

As schools began closing due to the virus, it has caused millions of parents to take a closer look at homeschooling and to consider going that route. 

Dr. Andrea Dennison is an assistant professor of school psychology at Texas State University.  She has studied why some parents choose to homeschool and says the families are motivated by a desire for control over their children's education.  Rather than waiting to hear what the local school district will be doing, they take matters into their own hands.  

The percentage of homeschooled children in grades K-12th is 3.3% or 1.7 million students. 

Why do parents choose homeschooling?  Here are the top 3. 

1. Concerns about the school environment (negative influences, drugs, exposure to COVID-19 and general safety).

 One mom said, "There is absolutely no way I will be sending my child into a caldron of germs."

2. A dissatisfaction with the academics at their school.

3 A desire to provide religious instruction.  They want to keep their children protected from the influences of the wider world for as long as they can and want a curriculum that includes the Bible.

With the ravages of C0VID-19, more parents are considering the effects the virus is having on education.  This is leading to more families being interested in taking their children out of traditional schools this fall and beyond.  In fact, two-thirds of parents with kids in elementary, middle or high school were concerned about their child falling behind. 

The pandemic has also affected many homeschooling families as well.  Many have been cut off from educational trips and other local homeschooling communities that they rely upon for sports and socializing.

So how are the new home-schooling families doing during this pandemic?  In a survey of over 1,000 parents who started homeschooling due to the pandemic, it was found that their children seem to do better and were happier outside a traditional school environment.  A few of the reasons were unchecked bullying and special needs that were not supported appropriately. 

What is the makeup of families that homeschool?  In many cases, parents who are able to homeschool effectively are two parent families who can live on one income.  It is very hard for parents to work from home and homeschool.

The pandemic has definitely caused parents to be more intentional about the kind of school experience they want for their children. 

Would love to hear your thoughts.  Many of you reading this are homeschooling your children.  

Did you start homeschooling after the virus came on the scene? 

What are the positives that have come from homeschooling your kids?

What are the challenges of homeschooling your kids? 

What would you say to someone who is considering homeschooling?

If your child attends a traditional school, why did you go that route?  

What are the advantages you have found by having your child attend a traditional school?

 Leave your comments, insight and ideas in the comment section below.

Last week, we announced the release of a brand new worship album for kids. 

The album is called 12 because it contains 12 new, original songs that will help kids grow in their faith.

We had a drawing to give away an album to celebrate the release.  

The winner of the album is Julissa Lopez.  Julissa is the Children's Ministry Director at ICC Church in Staten Island, New York.  Congrats Julissa! 

I am really pumped about this worship album.  The songs were written and produced by an amazing artist named Travis August. 

Each song was written as part of an intentional discipleship pathway that takes kids on a journey from salvation to spiritual leadership.  It corresponds with our Connect12 curriculum.  

Each song has a really cool lyrics video that can be used for live worship.  If you'd like to see a few samples of the songs, you can do so below.   Audio and lyrics have lead vocals and no vocals so you can use the songs in worship with your voice or the voice of Travis.  

You can get all 12 songs for only $39.00.  This is an incredible deal.  Most songs with a worship video sell for $12 to $15 each.  

You can preview the album and get more ordering information at this link.

The songs are all written with today's kids in mind and the words get stuck in your head which means it lodges in kids' long term memory. 

Below are some of the song samples. 

The most important thing we do is leading kids to Jesus.  It should be our #1 priority.  

We should not take this lightly.  Eternity is at stake.     

As children's ministry leaders, there are some key roles you should be in with regards to leading kids to Christ.  

Role #1 - faithfully and consistently share the Gospel with kids.  In classrooms.  In chapel.  In children's services.  At retreats.  In small groups.  In prayer time and devotionals.  

John 3:16 encapsulates the entire Bible.  "For God so loved the world" should weave its way into every lesson you teach.

#2 role - Host a class about salvation for kids and their parents.  When a child asks about inviting Jesus into their life, ask them to attend a salvation class with their parents.  This strategy can be very effective. In my last year of ministry at a local church, we baptized over 460 kids in one year.  Every single child had been through our salvation class for kids.  The class is available to you at this link.

#3 role - Partner with parents.  When possible, place tools in parents' hands that they can use to lead their child to Jesus.  One of parents' greatest joys is to lead their children to Jesus.  Don't take this role away from them (this applies to children and their parents who attend church faithfully).  The class we mentioned above can be one of the biggest ways you can partner with parents when God is at work in their child's life.  

#4 role - Be a guide.  We must remember that our role is to be a guide.  We cannot save anyone.  That job has already been taken by Jesus.  As a guide, our role is not to be pushing a child from behind into making a decision.  While there is no certain age for a child to accept Jesus, we can know certain signs to watch for.  If a child continues to come to you about making a decision for Christ, that is a sign that God is working in their life.  But let God do the work...don't force it.  

As a guide, our role is also not to hold kids back.  I have seen leaders and parents tell kids they are not ready to enter a relationship with Jesus because they are "too young."  I would say this...most of the time kids begin to be ready at the age of 7-8 years old.  At this age, they begin to understand abstract concepts.  But again, each child is different.  

Our role is not to push a child into a decision nor is it to hold them back.  Our role is to simply walk beside them, so to speak.  As we walk with them, we share the Gospel with them.  As we do this, God will draw them to Himself. 

This is your role.  Step into it and let God use you to reach many, many kids and parents with the Gospel.

I was thinking about David this week.  Here's this young kid, taking care of the family sheep herds.  The last person you would think about sending to battle against a huge man named Goliath. 

The reason David was willing to go to battle against Goliath was one simple thing:  HE HAD A CAUSE.  

Look what he says in I Samuel 17:29.

"David said, "What have I now done? Is there not a cause?"

David had a cause.  He wanted to silence the mouths of those who constantly ridiculed his heavenly Father.  He wanted to bring honor and glory to God.  

His cause was greater than his fear.  He appears to be fear free, but I can promise you that he was nervous.  

You know the rush that comes when a football team runs onto the field at game time?  That's probably the feeling he had as he walked toward the battle field.  If your cause is not big enough to make your knees shake, then you need to get a bigger cause.

Your cause may seem unattainable.  It may seem overwhelming at times.  It may leave you thinking, 

"Why did I start doing this?" 

"I feel overwhelmed.  It's too big a task for me."

"There's no way I can meet that goal?"

All of these doubts and fears can be overcome when you have Jesus guiding you.  He will work through you to accomplish the cause if you invite Him to help.  

Especially when your cause lines up His cause.  What is His biggest cause?  It tells us in Luke 19:10.

 "The Son of man came to see and save that which was lost."

When your cause becomes reaching people far from God, you can be sure that this is Jesus' cause as well.

"As ministers, we shouldn’t talk because we have to say something but because we have something to say."

Remember to praise God for what He has done in the past.  David reminded them that God had helped him kill a lion and a bear while watching over the sheep.  God had been faithful and the same God would be with Him that day.

If you want to live in victory, you too must have a divine cause. You must discover God's high purpose for your life and pursue it with a fervency of heart that inspires you to value the things of God even more than your own self-interest.   

Do you have a cause?

This can be especially true when you are trying to give feedback to a high performer who thinks they have it all together. 

But remember - everyone has some room for improvement, within their current set of capabilities or a broader set that will likely come in handy in the future.  Help them formulate a way to continue growing.

Feedback is often affiliated with criticism first and foremost. But it doesn't have to be that way.  If you give feedback with a positive attitude it can turn an unpleasant, uncomfortable meeting into an exciting opportunity to celebrate their wins and then discuss what's next on their leadership journey.

Something else to remember.  Always come prepared.  Do your homework.  Gather data and details that will support your feedback.  But don't spend the majority of the time dwelling on the past.  Instead, focus on what the team member can change or improve in the future. 

Make sure they clearly understand what you have shared with them and any action plans you are formulating with their help.

There are 3 big areas you should discuss with your leaders.

1. The team member's current performance.

2. Their future goals and aspirations.

3. Their next performance step.

Team members must know they can share these points without the fear of repercussions.  If they feel they will be fired for sharing their thoughts about these areas, they will be hesitant to share. 

Make sure you say "Thank you!"  Don't assume they know how well they are doing.  Start the session with positive feedback from how well they are leading.  Advice is more likely to be received when it builds on performance appreciation.   

Your role, as a leader, is to help your team members to continue growing.  Identify development areas, even if there are only a few.  Help your team members find out what is standing in their way, how to remove it or grow past it and what is next and how they will get there.  Identify development areas, even if there are only a few.

Did you know that 10% of black men are behind bars on any given day?  This is twice as high as Hispanic men and five times higher than white men.  Roughly 20% of black men have spent time in jail compared to 3% of white men. 

This has to stop.  We cannot allow this injustice to continue.  One way we can help change the racist culture we live in is to help the next generation avoid this sin.  Here are some tips as you talk about racism with kids.

If you have children, then racism, civil disobedience and police brutality are areas that you need to talk with them about. It's important to address the killings and protests honestly and in an age appropriate way.  Many parents struggle with how to protect their children from seeing the worst of the protests and violence while trying to explain the sin of racism at the same time.

Here are some tips that can help.

It's important to start early.  According to Dr. Jacqueline Doug'e , a pediatrician and child health advocate, children can internalize racial bias between the ages of 2 and 4.  Doctors say while children younger than 3 aren't going to understand what is happening on television, they will be able to pick up on the "fear, urgency or anger in people's voices and behavior.  Stress will show up in fussy or unregulated behavior."  To keep this from happening, parents should watch the news when the child is not present.

And according to Dr. Marietta Collins, a clinical psychologist at Morehouse School of Medicine, if you have preschoolers, you should start discussing racial differences in a positive way.  A parent can explain what melanin is and talk about how wonderful it is that the world has so many different kinds of people.

Older children will be more in tune with what's going on.  Parents should assume that their children know what is going on.  They will pick up news from social media, talking with friends or seeing the emotions of those close to them.  Once you access what they know, you can talk with them about what is happening without being too explicit.

Dr. Collins said that with older children, you should focus on how unfairly black people have been treated throughout American history to the present day, because fairness is something all children can understand.

Dr. Dougé suggested starting with something like: “There are things happening in the news that are upsetting us. Unfortunately there were police officers that made bad choices for the wrong reasons because of the color of someone's skin.”

Children may also become afraid when they see or hear about all the violence that has been taking place.  Assure them that you will keep them safe.  Let your child know that there are people working really hard to make sure racism doesn't continue.  And let them know what you are doing to help with this.

What about pre-teens and teens?  Pre-teens and teens will most likely be seeing all the news coverage on their personal smartphones.  Parents can ask them whether they have seen anything like about the riots and protests, what they think and what about it was upsetting or inspiring.

Many pre-teens and teens communicate with their friends through social media.  Reposting.  Retweeting.  Instagram post.  Facebook post.  Messenger.

Social media gives them an avenue to be part of online activism with their friends and family.

"It is not enough to talk about racism, you must strive to be anti-racist and fight against racist policies and practices.  If you have the privilege, make space, speak up or amplify issues of inequity and injustice.  Children see everything."                                                 Dr. Heart Garris  

You can also provide your child with books and movies that have racially diverse characters.  Parents can make good use of movies and documentaries that can educate older teens on the history of discrimination.  These can be used to jump start conversations about racism and how they can help fight it.

To me, one of the best things about heaven will be the diversity of those that will be there.   We get a great description of this in Revelation 7:9.

"After this I looked, and behold, a great multitude that no one could number, from every nation, from all tribes and peoples and languages, standing before the throne and before the Lamb, clothed in white robes, with palm branches in their hands."

Let's continue to stand against racism.  Proactively stand.  The more we work toward seeing racism defeated, the more we will have a little bit of heaven on earth.

ESPN recently produced a 10 part documentary about the career of Michael Jordan.  It was very interesting to watch. 

One thing was very clear about Micheal and the Bulls.  They were laser focused on winning an NBA championship.  This resulted in the team winning 6 titles.  

I am reminded of this quote from Michael Jordan.

"Great players win games, great teams win championships."

When you get your team aligned and focused on a common vision, you can dominate.  Let's look at a few tips on how to do that.

Make sure everyone knows what the vision is.  It's hard to align behind a common vision when you don't even know what the vision is. 

So, the starting point is creating a common vision.  Keep the vision short (one or two sentences at the most).  Make the vision laser-focused.  Say it every time you meet.  Put it in writing on all your communication pieces.  Repeat it.  Repeat it.  Repeat it.  Repeat it.  Repeat it.  Repeat it.  Repeat it.

Want to know if your team knows what your vision statement is?  It's easy, just ask them.  Fulfilling the vision should be part of their DNA.

Everything you do should be a step toward fulfilling the vision. 

Your ministry calendar should reflect this. 

Your event schedule should reflect this.

You budget should reflect this. 

Your team should reflect this. 

Your programs should reflect this.

When team members get to the point where they have memorized the vision statement, are committed to it and are living it out, you will be positioned to make a big impact. 

I'd love to see your vision statement.  Share it with us in the comment section below.