RELEVANT CHILDREN'S MINISTRY

This past weekend, I had a meeting with all of the kids who are going to our summer camp and their parents. 

When we mentioned that there will be no game systems or cell phones allowed, a collective "uhhhh" sound was heard. 

The thought of not having their cell phone or gaming device for a week made them very uncomfortable. 

Today's kids...especially pre-teens...feel lost without their screens. 

But there are great benefits that come from having kids go "no screen" for a period of time.  

They get away from the constant pressure to answer a call or text.  With technology, we are now wired to respond immediately when our phone dings.  But at camp this urgency is removed which helps kids be more relaxed after the initial shock of not having their device.

Nearly half of the next generation spends every waking moment with screens. Playing games. Texting. Streaming. Watching. 

But let's be honest. It's not just the next generation struggling with this.  Adults also face the same challenge. Think about it. When you wake up in the morning, what do you immediately do? When you fall asleep at night, what are you doing? When you are sitting in a parking lot waiting for the kiddos, what are you doing? 

This is everyone's world today. Our phones and tablets and laptops keep us connected, help us with driving directions, let us order food on the go, listen to music, and a host of other apps and programs that help us navigate life in 2026. 

Did you know there are 6.92 billion smartphone users in the world? That's 86.29% of the global population. The average person in America spends 4 hours and 37 minutes every day on their smartphone.

The younger the generation, the more time they are spending with screens. Gen Z spends the most time with 9 hours per day. Millennials spend around 3.7 hours daily, while Gen X and Baby Boomers spend less time overall. 

Americans check their phones 96 times a day. That's once every ten minutes.  

Here is some more interesting facts about this... 

• 74% of Americans feel uneasy leaving their phone at home.

• 71% of say they check their phones within the first 10 minutes of waking up.

• 53% say that they have never gone more than 24 hours without their cell phone.

• 47% consider themselves “addicted” to their phones

• 70% check their phones within five minutes of receiving a notification.

• 64% use their phone on the toilet.

• 61% have texted someone in the same room as them

• 48% of people say they feel a sense of panic or anxiety when their cell phone battery goes below 20%.

• 45% say that their phone is their most valuable possession. 

Let's jump back and talk about kids now.

The average child ages 8 to 12 spends about 4.5 hours a day with screens. 

The first iPod came out in 2001 and the first iPhone in 2007. Today's kids have never known life without cell phone screens.  They've never used payphones or a physical map to drive somewhere. They've never been bound with a phone cord.  

Today's kids (and adults) are addicted to their screens. They use their smartphones or devices to socialize, learn, play, communicate, and search for information.   

Studies show that excessive screen time can lead to social isolation, negative impact on mental health, and reduced physical activity. It can also lead to anxiety, depression, and sleep deprivation.

In the book "The Anxious Generation" Jonathan Haidt says that phones began rewiring kids' brains in the the early 2010's. 

The shift has gone from "play-based childhood to "phone-based childhood."  Children have less access to outdoor play and just playing as kids do.

What's the solution? Haidt says we should make sure kids are getting time to play, delaying smartphone access to high school and limiting social media use until kids are at least 16 years old.

As I closed out the meeting with the campers and their parents this past weekend, I shared with them the spiritual benefits of being screen free at camp. This will allow their attention to be on God and what He wants to do in their life. Away from the screens, they will be more able to hear God more clearly and let Him draw them closer to Him. 

Digital detox!

Disconnecting to connect with God and other kids in a fresh way!

Here are some tips to pass along to parents not just for camp but in the flow of everyday life.

• Set up a time every day when devices are put away.  
• Spend more time outside.  Play outside. 
• Put phones away during meal time.
• Turn off notifications. 

Help kids see that screens are not bad...the devices just need to be managed properly.  I am believing that God is going to speak to our kids in a fresh way at camp and that with the absence of screens it will be easier for them to hear His voice and respond. 

How can you know if a church  values children's ministry? Some churches say they value children's ministry but their actions tell a different story. 

Let's put it to a test. Here are 7 ways you can know if a church truly does value children's ministry.

Volunteers

The church encourages people to serve in children's ministry. It is high on the list when it comes to volunteer opportunities. 

The best, most gifted volunteers can be found in the church's children's ministry.  The choir loft isn't full of volunteers while the children's ministry volunteer team is minuscule. 

The church knows this - the success of the church rises and falls on the strength of the volunteer team that ministers to the next generation. 

Facilities

When parents walk into your facilities, what are your facilities saying? 

Children are important here?

We care enough about the next generation to create quality environments for them?

Our children's facilities were designed with kids in mind...not adults?

Subpar children's facilities will make your children's ministry seem worse than it is while high quality children's facilities will make your children's ministry seem better than it is. 

Facilities for children matters...a lot. You can't stick kids in the basement in an environment that looks like a hospital and expect growth.

Your adult space may look great...but if your children's space isn't popping...then you will struggle to grow the ministry.

Budget

The children's ministry budget should be one of the largest budgets in the church. If a church says they care about reaching and discipling the next generation, then their budget allocations will reflect this. 

Money invested in children's ministry will pay for itself many times over in families who are reached.

Show me your budget and I will tell you how much you value children's ministry. 

Staffing 

A church that values children's ministry will have adequate staff.  I have created a staffing chart that shows how many staff you should have in your children's ministry based on attendance.  If you'd like a copy of the chart, feel free to email me and I will send it to you.

Visibility

The children's ministry will have high visibility.  This includes pulpit declaration, bulletin space, announcements, screen time, and an overall culture that says children's ministry is important to us.

Partnerships

The children's ministry will not be a silo. Other ministries in the church will partner with the children's ministry. There will be a partnership with student ministry. There will be a partnership with adult ministry.  The children's ministry will often collaborate with other ministries to reach and disciple families.  

Events

The church will invest generously to host children and family outreach events. Some examples are VBS, Easter outreach, summer camp, fall festivals / trunk or treat, Christmas events, etc. 

The entire church will get behind these events and will get involved by giving, volunteering, promoting, etc. 

Does your church value children's ministry? These are some good talking points as you lead children's ministry in your church. Feel free to share this article with your church leaders. 

A lot is at stake...we only have a short window of time to reach and disciple children.

This past weekend, I had the opportunity to speak at a children's ministry training event at First Baptist Church of Rogers, Arkansas. 

My friend, Shay Caldwell, is the children's pastor there. He is a great leader and I was impressed with all that God is doing through the ministry there. 

Here are some pictures I took. I trust they will inspire you and challenge you to go all out to reach kids and families. 

How can you know when a child is ready to enter a relationship with Jesus?

Is there a specific age of accountability?

How can you help kids understand what it means to follow Jesus so that "they get it?" 

I remember one weekend when I was teaching the elementary group in my church.

I asked one of the girls, who was 9 years old at the time, if she had accepted Jesus as her Savior.

Her response was, "Not yet. My mother doesn't think I am old enough to understand."

I have also seen the opposite happen.  A parent is pushing for his or her child to "pray the prayer" and then get baptized. But the child is only 4-5 years old. 

So how do you know when a child is old enough to step across the line of faith?  

As a children's ministry leader, it is crucial that you know what to look for and how you can help families navigate the most important decision their child will ever make.

Here are the key things a child needs to know if they are going to enter a relationship with Jesus.

I have sinned.  Before you can be saved, you have to understand that you are lost.  If you ask a child if they have ever sinned and they say "no," then they are not ready to be saved.  Romans 3:23 makes this very clear.  

There is a price for sin that must be paid.  A child must understand that they cannot enter a relationship with Jesus until their sin bill is paid. (Romans 6:23)

Jesus died for our sins.  He has paid our sin bill.  We must ask Him to forgive our sins and trust Him and Him alone, for our salvation. (John 3:16, Romans 10:9-10)

Another way you can know is this - the child keeps bringing up the subject on their own. If they keep coming back to you about this, then it is a sign that God is drawing them to Himself.

Here's something else to look for - you sense the child understands they need to make this decision. It is not because their friends have done this and it seems like a cool thing to do.  Or they saw their friends get baptized and it looked fun to them.  There's a big difference between "wanting" to make a decision vs. "needing" to make a decision.

What age should a child be?  This is different for each child.  However, around age 7-8, children begin to understand abstract thoughts.  Here's an example.

You tell a child that Jesus is the bridge back to God.  A 5-year-old child is thinking there is a literal bridge back to God that you have to cross.  But an older child understands that this is just an example of what it means to follow Jesus. 

Here's what I often tell parents and church leaders.  It is not our role to hold a child back from making a decision.  It is also not our role to push children into making a premature decision. Our role is to walk beside the child and have conversations about following Jesus. As you do this, God will draw them to Himself.  

It is so important to be thorough when sharing the Gospel with children.  Children are the greatest mission field in the world. We know that most people come to Christ before the age of 18.  We must reach them while their hearts are open to the Gospel.  

I am also a big proponent of involving parents in their child's decision for Christ.  I recently wrote an article about this that you can read here - Why I Won't Lead Kids in a Salvation Prayer at VBS.

If you are looking for a resource to help you lead children and parents to Christ, then Starting Point  is a great resource. It's a salvation class that parents and their children attend together. It has been used to lead thousands of kids to Christ.  You can get more information at this link. 

What a privilege we have to share the Gospel with children and their parents.  May God continue to pour down His blessings upon you while you are sharing the Gospel.  There is nothing that is more important than this. 

In just a few weeks, I will be heading to summer camp with kids from our church.  

We will be at summer camp for 5 days.  It's a significant amount of time. 

So why am I going?  That's a long time to be away from my family.  

I am going because I am a believer in kids' camp.  Here are 5 reasons why I take kids to camp.

It helps kids get away from the noise.

Kids are constantly bombarded with the noise of social media, video games, music, TV, internet, and other means of messaging.  Combine all of these and you get children who have little to no quiet time.  

It can be a challenge as the bombardment of noise drowns out the gentle whispers of the Holy Spirit. But when kids are at camp...away from all of the noise...they can better hear from God. They can experience the presence of God who says...

Be still and know that I am God. Psalm 46:10.  

Today's kids have a hard time with periods of silence.  Unplugging is not easy. Take away their cell phone and they get anxiety. But when they go to camp, they have the opportunity (even though they may not like it at first) to unplug. When this happens, it opens the door for God to do a big work in their life. 

It deepens their relationships.

Time deepens relationships.  At camp, kids get to spend more time with each other and their counselors. This helps them deepen these relationships.  Discipleship happens through relationships. Deeper relationships bud forth into kids developing a deeper walk with God. 

Kids learn about teamwork.

At camp, kids learn they weren't meant to do life alone.  Through games, activities, discussions, and teaching, they learn how to cooperate and get along with others.  

It helps kids grow in their faith. 

Chapel. Quiet times with God. Bible study. Worship. Prayer times.  All of these elements help kids significantly grow in their faith. 

Life changing spiritual decisions are often made at camp.  

It helps kids with resiliency.

Kids learn how to persevere. Kids learn how to be brave. Kids learn how to not give up.  These life skills will help kids as they enter their teen years.

Your turn.  

Are you taking the kids in your ministry to camp this year?  Why or why not?

What do you think about summer camp?  

 Share your comments in the comment section below.

The LGBTQ agenda continues to be pushed toward children...even without parental consent. 

Here is the latest example of this. This happened in a elementary school in Elk Grove, California. Watch this video for more information.

We've all read the stats about how many young people are disengaging from the church. 

Why are they walking away?

What is causing the exit?  

Here are 5 big reasons why I believe many of the next generation are abandoning the church and in some cases even the faith.

Hypocrisy in the church. 

It seems almost every day you hear about another minister who has fallen.  

The next generation is watching.  They are watching to see if we are going to live out the faith that we are trying to convert them to.

Are we practicing what we preach?  

Are we living out the Gospel?  

Does our walk match our talk?  

They are watching to see if the faith we are pushing their way is life-changing.  Is it changing our life as we read and study the Word of God?

Of course, this doesn't mean we are perfect.  We will make mistakes.  We will fail at times.  We will blow it.  The next generation doesn't expect perfection.  But they do want us to acknowledge it when we stumble.  

We cannot hide our sin. When we cry out for forgiveness from a broken, contrite heart, the next generation will see this and learn about the grace and mercy of our God.  The God who is patient and long suffering.

Covering up and hiding our sin causes the next generation to question the validity of our faith. But confessing and forsaking our sin can help us show the next generation that our faith is real and valid.

Science.

The next generation wants scientific evidence that Jesus was a real person who died, was buried, and rose again. 

They want to know if evolution is true or not.  They want to know how the world came to be. When they get to high school and college, they begin to hear the evidence for evolution and they have no answers. 

We did not prepare them for this and we didn't teach them why we believe what we believe. Often, if they can't defend their faith, they will walk away from their faith.

Weak faith foundation.

For the most part, today's kids are Biblically illiterate.  This is a result of their parents only taking them to church once a month or even less.  It's hard for kids to get a solid faith foundation when they are not being consistently brought to church. 

Not to mention the kids whose parents don't study the Bible and pray at home. 

This results in a faith that can easily be toppled over when faced with difficulties and hard questions.

Natural disasters. 

Tornadoes.  Hurricanes.  Earthquakes.  Tsunami's.  Pestilence.  Starvation.

Why doesn't God rescue everyone when these things happen?

Why would a good God allow bad things to happen?

Why do bad things happen to good people?

We live in a broken world.  It is heartbreaking when these disasters take place.  

There are times when God steps in with a miracle.  There are times when He brings hope to a hopeless situation.  

But when He doesn't, we have to trust His heart and know that He is with us...even during the worst of times. 

Unanswered prayers.

There is power in prayer and God does answer prayer.  But what about when He doesn't seem to answer your prayers?  What about the times when the heavens seem shut to you?

What about when the next generation doesn't seem to be heard by God?  

It is a mystery for sure when God chooses to answer some prayers and doesn't answer others.

We must help the coming generations see that we serve a good God who delights in answering our prayers.  And when His answer is "no," there is a good reason for it.

We can no longer push these questions to the side and expect the next generation to ignore them. Instead, we must help them work through these and cultivate answers that will make their faith strong.

p.s. If you are wanting to teach kids apologetics, then I highly recommend these two curriculum series. 

Click on the images for more information.

If you are not familiar with the "Nones," they are a group people who do not believe in God.

The Nones are steadily rising and becoming a force to be reckoned with.  

According to recent data from Pew Research, 28% of U.S. adults say they are religiously unaffiliated. This includes atheists, agnostics or "nothing in particular."

In the latest data, 17% of “nones” identify as atheist, 20% say they are agnostic and 63% choose “nothing in particular.”

Dive deeper into their beliefs and you will discover this:

• 60% cite disbelief or skepticism as the reason why they don't believe.
  

• 60% question Bible teachings. 
  

• 32% don't believe in God.        
  

• 30% have had a bad experience with religious people.
  

• 47% don't like churches.
  

• 41% don't see a need for religion in their life.

• 43% say religion does more harm than good.
  

• 90% of nones say they seldom or never go to religious services.

Some nones consider themselves "spiritual" instead of "religious."  About half say spirituality is important to them. But their "spirituality" is way off base as they believe animals have spirits as well as parts of nature such as mountains, rivers or trees.  

We see this portrayed in many Disney movies aimed at kids such as Pocahontas, Little Mermaid, Lion King, Haunted Mansion, Scrooge, and many more.  I am not saying you shouldn't watch these movies. Just be aware that it they subtlety teach spirituality outside of organized religion. 

The vast majority of "nones" say it is possible to be moral and have good values without believing in God.

The saddest part of this is found in another survey done among nones. It revealed something shocking. Here it is.

78% of nones grew up in church.

The majority of nones sat in our classes, participated in our VBS programs, went through our programs and learned the Bible verses we placed in front of them.  

But when they got older...they walked away from the faith we had tried to instill in them.

When questioned, the nones provided the three big reasons why they walked away.  

1. They became disillusioned with the church.

2. They stopped beileving.

3. They are too busy.  

So what will the next generation do?  

Will they buy into the philosophy of the nones?  

Will they walk away from the faith? 

Will they be grounded enough to know why they believe what they say they believe?

Will they become owners of the faith and not just renters?

Will they see the necessity of staying tied to a local church?

If we can prepare them to stand for God's truth, we have a big opportunity to see them follow Jesus for a lifetime.

Here are some resources that can help you with this.

Pranksters.  Another apologetic series about the Bible. It is available at this link.

What will the next generation do?  

Will they be swept up into a culture designed by the nones?  

Will they stay true to the principles they have learned from us?

God can use you and I to reach and disciple the next generation. 

Will you accept the challenge?

Your greatest leadership challenge in 2024 is not going to be leading a children's ministry.

It's not going to be leading volunteers.

It's not going to be leading parents. 

It's not going to be leading staff members.

Your greatest leadership challenge in 2024 is going to be leading yourself well.

Let's make it plain and simple...the most challenging person you lead is the person that stares back at you in the mirror.

1 Timothy 4:16 tells us this.

"Keep a close watch on yourself and on the teaching.  Persist in this, for by doing so you will save both yourself and your hearers."

Notice that it says to keep a watch on yourself first. As you first lead yourself well, then you will be able to lead others well.

As you enter the year 2024 will you make spending time with Jesus a #1 goal?  The evil one knows if you consistently spend time with Jesus, you will be filled with joy, anointing, and spiritual power. He will try to hand you excuse after excuse after excuse to miss your daily time with Jesus.  

Don't get so busy working for God that you don't have time to spend with God.

Rick Warren, beloved former pastor of Saddleback Church, got this.  He said...

Years ago, I stopped working on building a church and instead focused on building me.  As I grew, the church grew.

You will face many things in 2024 that will try to get in your heart and make you go off course:

Bitterness. 

Anger. 

Lust. 

Covetousness.  

Frustration.

Discouragement.  

Sin.  

Doubt.  

Comparison.  

False Teaching. 

Disappointment.

Don't let this happen.  Guard your heart against these things.  

Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.  Proverbs 4:23.

When something is valuable, we put a guard around it. We protect it. 

I read some heart-breaking news this past week.  A well known preacher of the Gospel has fallen and His ministry is basically over due to sexual sin. Somewhere along the way, he didn't guard his heart against lust and didn't lead himself well. 

I am thinking of another well known pastor who recently passed away.  A few years ago, he let false doctrine enter His heart.  He replaced the truth of God's Word with his own finite feelings. He departed from the faith and began teaching heresy. He didn't guard the truth in his heart.

My prayer is that you will go the distance.  That you will finish the course God has planned and placed before you. For that to happen, you must lead yourself well. 

It is not always easy to lead yourself well.  It takes discipline, determination, intentionality, and commitment.

Most of all, it takes dying to yourself daily.  Surrender your will and your ways to His complete control.

Greatness in ministry is not measured in years...but in decades.  

Tune your heart to God's. Walk with Him. Talk with Him. Seek Him.  

Put Him at the top of your priority list.  

My prayer is that 2024 will be your best year ever in ministry.  That can happen when you lead yourself well. 

p.s. Have you read my book "Lead Well in Children's Ministry?"  It contains everything you need to lead well in 2024.  You can get your copy at this link.

In my Bible reading last week, I came across an interesting verse about Solomon.  Look what it says about Him. 

If you know me, you know I am all about reaching the next generation.  I go to churches and share with them the extreme importance of turning around and investing in the generation to come. 

I was at a church in Phoenix this past weekend and reminded them that they must reach the next generation if they want to see their church thrive and grow.

But I also shared with them that a healthy family is made up of all generations. Great grandparents, grandparents, parents, teenagers, elementary children, preschoolers and babies.  A healthy church will mirror this and have all generations represented.

Don't get so focused on reaching the next generation that you forget to reach and disciple senior adults as well. 

Here's why you need senior adults in your church. 

Senior adults can be great prayer warriors.  Some of the greatest prayer warriors I have met are senior adults.  My father and mother pray daily for my family and I.  Their prayers make a difference in our lives.  

Do you have a prayer ministry at your church?  If not, it's time to start one. Senior adults will lead the prayer charge if you invite them to do so.  Grandma's prayers are something you need in your family and ministry.

Senior adults make great volunteers.  Some of the best volunteers I have ever served with have been senior adults.  Many of them have been faithfully serving Jesus for decades.  Challenge the senior adults in your ministry to start serving. There is no retirement from serving Jesus.  Senior adults who are retired often have more free time to serve.  

One of the most amazing volunteers I have ever served with is a man named Will.  He came to Christ in his senior adult years and was immediately on fire for Jesus.  He served many hours during the week and on weekends.  I often kidded him and told him he was putting in more hours than our "paid" staff members. 

Senior adults can be effective mentors. Senior adults have a great opportunity to turn and mentor the generations that are behind them.  Boys who need a father figure in their life.  Mothers who need advice on raising their children.  Couples who need help for their marriage.  

What would happen if you started a mentoring ministry and you were intentional about enlisting senior adults to serve as mentors?  What an impact that could have! 

Senior adults bring wisdom to the table.  They have been down the road farther than those coming behind them.   They can offer great insight and instruction if you will ask them.

When you combine the wisdom of senior adults with the zeal of youth, great things happen.

Senior adults can impact the next generation. Cast vision to your senior adults for this. Help them see the huge impact they can have if they will invest in the generations coming behind them.

Senior adults bring balance to a church.  As I stated at the beginning of this article, a healthy church is made up of all generations.  The unhealthy extremes are only having young people in your church or only having senior adults in your church.  

Here is a bonus tip if want to measure the generational health of your church.  In a balanced church, children (birth through 5th grade) will make up 15-20% of the congregation. Here's an example. If you have 100 people attending your church, then a minimum of 15 to 20 of them should be children.  In a really healthy church, it can trend as high as 30% being children.

Senior adults can help finance the mission of the church.  Giving in many churches depends heavily on the tithes and offerings of senior adults.  The Boomer and older generations were raised to be faithful in their giving. Share with them the importance of investing financially in the next generation.

Often senior adults have the financial means to help move the church forward. I have seen this happen firsthand. At one church where I served, we were able to purchase a new church building because a widow lady left $6,000,000 for the ministry in her will.  

Some senior adults live on a fixed income.  Although they may not be able to give $6,000,000 they can be faithful with their tithes and offerings and God can use it to help build the ministry and reach people for Christ.

Senior adults can bring God's blessings to a church. I believe God will bless the church that not only focuses on the younger generations, but senior adults as well.  Throughout Scripture, we read that we should honor and respect the older generation. God will bless the church that does so.

Although most people think I look a lot younger than I really am, that is beginning to change.  A few weeks ago, I was checking out at a store. The cashier looked at me and asked if I would like the senior discount?  What????? Do I look like a senior adult????  This is the first time I have been asked this question.  She explained that people 55 and older got a 20% discount.  Of course, I then let her know I was 55.  It reminded me that my senior adult years are not too far ahead of me. 

As I continue to journey toward my later years, I want to serve Jesus with all of my heart. May we all serve Him until our last breathe takes us to be with Him.

Here in the United States, I believe we often take for granted the privilege we have to worship God and teach children about Him in freedom.  

I have a friend who lives in China. Born and raised there.  I cannot reveal his name due to security issues. 

He is the primary person who provides training and resources for those who serve in children's ministry in the underground churches in China. At the time of this writing, he is providing training and resources for over 100,000 children's ministry leaders in the underground churches. 

A few months ago, some of the underground churches had a Vacation Bible School.  Someone found out and turned them in to the communist police.  The police came and arrested the VBS leaders and took them to prison.  The leaders will probably spend months and maybe even years for simply trying to teach God's Word to children.

When I first met my friend in China, I asked him how He became a believer.  I was curious how someone who was born and raised in China heard the Gospel.  He shared that decades earlier, a missionary from Houston, Texas had come to China and led his great, great, great grandfather to Jesus.  He said he is a 5th generation believer.

This was a great reminder of two things.

First, you won't see all of the fruit of your ministry until years from now.  Some of the fruit you won't see until you get to Heaven.  Stay faithful.  God will use you beyond anything you can imagine.

Secondly, join me in praying for our brothers and sisters who serve Jesus in the midst of intimidation and persecution.  Pray that the Word of God will continue to spread even in the face of jail time.

This past weekend, I was at Marcus Pointe Church in Pensacola, Florida speaking at a children's ministry conference for their volunteers. I also provided them with a consultation to help improve the ministry.

Marcus Pointe has a great children's ministry and they are reaching hundreds of children each weekend. My friend, Roger Stuart, is the children's pastor.  They have 3 campuses with more coming. 

Their children's ministry building is pretty amazing. They hired a man in the church to lead the theming.  As an added bonus, the man built 3D props and cool environments for Disney World.

Here are some pictures of their environments.