RELEVANT CHILDREN'S MINISTRY

At the recent D6 conference, I was asked to share in a general session about parents leading their children spiritually.

Thankfully, in the last 20 years, the church has made great strides in helping parents grasp and understand their role as the biggest spiritual influence in their children's lives.

Numerous tools and resources have been developed to equip parents to be the spiritual leader of their child.  From take home papers to apps to videos to devotionals, there are lots of great resources available.

But let's be realistic.  All of us, at times, have wondered if the tools and resources we are placing in parents' hands are being used.  Take home papers end up in the parking lot or floorboard of the van where they remain until it's time to clean the vehicle.  Text messages ding parents' phones, but how often do parents follow through with the questions you sent them?  You wonder if the apps are actually being used.  Facebook posts for parents where you see some views and likes, but far less than you had hoped for.

In my talk at the D6 conference, I compared the tools and resources we give parents to helping them get a hit for their children.  If you want to make the comparison, you could say these tools and resources are singles, maybe even a double at times.  And they do make a difference when they are used.  Over time, singles and doubles can add up to parents scoring points for their children's spiritual journey.

But one of the challenges the church faces is not being able to fully see what happens in the home.  So we end up hoping and praying the tools and resources are being used. 
 
But what if we could help parents hit a home run with their kids' discipleship?  What if we could give parents the opportunity to add some big, high-impact, game changing home runs with their children?  Singles are good.  Doubles are good.  But there's nothing that can impact a game like a home run.

I believe there are a few key times in a family's life when you can sit them up to hit a home run with their children.  Let's look at some of these high-profile, big impact opportunities that can change a family's life.  All of these are designed for parents and children to go through together.

Home run opportunity #1 - Parent and Child Dedication.  Have parents go through a class before the dedication.  In the class, share not only the significance and meaning of the dedication, but also teach parents how to be their child's spiritual leader on a day-to-day basis. 

Home run opportunity #2 - Bible Presentation.  When children are entering elementary school, host a Bible presentation.  Include a class where you teach kids and parents how we got the Bible, how to read it and how to apply it.  Show parents how to make the Bible an every day part of their family's journey.  At the end of the class, have parents present a Bible to their child and pray over them.

Home run opportunity #3 - Accepting Jesus as Savior.  Parents should be involved in their child's most important life decision.  Rather than praying a salvation prayer with kids when their parents are not present, move to a class format that parents and their children attend together.  In this class, explain what it means to follow Jesus.  Give parents the opportunity to lead their children in a prayer of salvation.  Also provide them with follow-up tools to go back over the content at home.

Home run opportunity #4 - Baptism.  After completing home run #3, kids and parents can attend a baptism class.  Baptism is carefully explained and you will see many parents make a decision to be baptized as well.  I remember a baptism where 3 generations were baptized together.  Grandfather, father and son were all baptized at the same time.  Talk about a home run, there's nothing like seeing a child and parent take this step together.  I've seen it happen hundreds of times.

Home run opportunity #5 - Elementary Graduation Celebration.  When children are moving from elementary into middle school, parents get nervous.  How do we parent a teenager?  How can I prepare my child for life as a teenager?  What new challenges or temptations will they face?  How can I help my child make wise decisions?

Bring children and parents together for a class that teaches parents and children how to navigate the middle school years.  Trust me, parents will welcome the Biblical advice you will provide.  Close out the class with a time of parental blessing.  Parents write out a note to their child, read it to them and pray over them. 

How do I know these 4 milestones are home runs?  First, you can see it in the parent's demeanor and hear it in their voices.  Secondly, there are tears.  Lots of tears as parents and children pray together.  You can hear the impact in their prayers.  You can sense it as parents read a blessing over their child.

You can see and hear the home runs unfold right before your eyes.

Does this mean we should stop trying to hit singles and doubles each week through take home papers, apps, etc.?  No, again, these can have a compound effect for parents and children.  But if really want to see life-changing discipleship, add in the home run steps listed above and you will see major life change in families.

I believe a great example of a home run experience for a child and parent is found in Abraham and his son, Isaac.  God set it up by telling Abraham to take his son, Isaac, to the mountain and sacrifice him.  Wow...talk about setting up a home run experience!  As you know, at the last minute, God told Abraham not to sacrifice Isaac.   It was a life-changing moment for Abraham and Isaac.  They never forgot that day, I am sure.  It was a catalyst in their faith journey and relationship with each other.

If you'd like more information about the experiences I talked about in this article, you can see samples, video clips and more at the link below.

Click here to see home run samples and ordering options.  

Help the parents in your ministry hit a home run with their kids.

Last week, as I was reading God's Word, a verse jumped out at me.  Here it is.

"After he became the father of Methuselah, Enoch walked faithfully with God 300 years and had other sons and daughters."         Genesis 5:22

Did you notice when Enoch began walking with God?

It was when he became a father.  The birth of his son, Methuselah, was a catalyst that brought Him closer to God and prompted Him to begin walking with God faithfully.

I believe this still rings true today.  One of the best times to reach parents is when they have a new baby.  It's a wake-up call.  It causes many parents to begin feeling the weight of giving their child some type of religious training and life foundation.

And so they walk into your church, looking for some help with this new "parenting" season of their life.

If you want to reach them, then make sure your nursery is clean, calm and comforting.  Nursery team members have a huge role in making the new family feel welcome.  If there is any hint that the baby won't be cared for, you'll have a hard time convincing the new mother to leave her child with you.

In this post, I share 10 keys to effective nursery ministry. 

Another great way to connect with new parents is through baby dedication.  Attach a class to your dedication and require parents to go through it before their child is dedicated.  In the class, explain what the dedication is about and then teach them how to raise their children to love Jesus.  And most importantly, share the Gospel with the parents as part of the class.  I have done this and seen many parents come to Christ as they experienced the class.

Here is the child dedication curriculum I created for churches.  Hundreds of parents have gone through it and taken spiritual steps because they attended. People have also invited Jesus into their life as the Gospel is shared in the class.  You can get more info. and check it out at this link. 

There is a statement I think about often.  Here it is. 

"When you take a child by the hand, you take a parent by the heart."

It happened to Enoch and it can happen to the young families in your community.  Seize the opportunity. 

A few months ago, I wrote about the impact sports is having on families.  It's one of the reasons families are not in church on Sunday.

In our culture, there used to be a day when Sunday was set aside as the Lord's day.  Games and other activities that pulled on families were scheduled on Saturday, but not on Sunday.

I'm all for sports and other activities that provide families with opportunities to spend time together.  I played Little League and football growing up.  But the games were held on a weekday or Saturday...not on Sunday.  Sunday was reserved for attending church.

Somewhere along the way, sports and other activities have gotten pushed over into Sunday.  Not all the time...but a lot of the time.  Enough that it can take kids and families away from church for weeks, and even months at a time, if they are on a "traveling team."

Parents are also busier than ever with their work and other activities.  In many cases, they may have to work on Saturday and when Sunday rolls around, they are exhausted and may choose to sleep in, do a family outing or watch online.

You can also see this reflected in families' attendance patterns.  Past expectations were to be in church 4 Sundays each month or at least 3 out of 4 Sundays.  Now the average family is in church 2 out of 4 weeks or even 1 out of 4 weeks.

Where is this taking us?  The truth is, if a child only gets 25% to 50% of the lessons at church, they are going to have a very shallow faith foundation.  I know they are supposed to be discipled at home first and foremost, but I believe the same attendance patterns for parents, leaves them ill-equipped to disciple their children.

You can't pass on what you don't have yourself.  It's hard to make the case for weekly attendance at church when you set a different example for your children.

I am reminded of this quote...

"I can't hear what you are saying, because your actions are speaking so loudly."

As a parent, it's hard to make the case for faithful church attendance, when your actions are saying otherwise.

We can be sure...kids are watching...they are picking up on what our priorities are...they are realizing what is important to us. 

Spiritually shallow parents raise spiritually shadow kids. 

If you're reading this as a children's ministry leader and feel discouraged...don't.  We have a great opportunity to make a difference in families' lives in these areas.

The starting point is to invest in and equip parents, so they can recognize what is really important when it comes to raising children.

Sports are important.   Academics are important.   Social interaction is important.  Financial security is important.

But nothing is more important than putting God in first place in your family.  When that happens, Sunday becomes a core part of who you are as a Christ-follower.  There is no question about attending church when Sunday rolls around.  It's who we are....part of the family of God.  It's what we do...honor God by meeting with other believers to worship Him.

I often quote the saying, "In the race to a child's heart, the first one there wins."

It's a great truth...but I think we should add another quote.

"In the race to a parent's heart, the first one there wins."

If we can effectively connect and disciple parents in their early days of parenting, we can help them establish a spiritual foundation for their kids and family.

One important time you can seize to do this is when families have a newborn.  You can get there first and pour into them, as they prepare to dedicate their baby to the Lord.  It is crucial that we have a class parents go through before they dedicate their child and themselves.

That's the reason we created the Parent & Child Dedication class.  It not only helps parents understand what the dedication is and is not, but it also shows parents how to establish the right priorities and equips them to lead their children spiritually.  Many churches are using this to impact young parents.  You can get more info. here about this resource. 

That's just one of the key times when you can help parents establish their priorities.  There are several other key times when you can influence parents.  You can get more info. at this link.

I want to challenge you to make influencing parents one of your top ministry goals.  When we do this, we can see families shift their focus back to what is most important.

Your turn.  How do you help families keep their priorities in order?  How can we do a better job of influencing parents?  Share your thoughts and inside with us in the comment section below.

Several years ago, I was leading the children's ministry at a local church.

I had only been there about six months, when I began to notice something that caused me to make a change in how we did Parent & Child dedication.

Families would sign up online for the dedication, but the first face-to-face contact we had with them was the morning of the dedication.

Waiting with the parents for the dedication to begin, I listened to their conversations.  It became apparent that many of them had no idea what the dedication was about.  I realized we were missing a golden opportunity to not only share with the parents what the dedication was about, but to also use the dedication to equip parents to disciple their children. 

And so I started a Parent & Child Dedication class.  We begin requiring parents to go through the class before they dedicated their children.  The class was held two weeks before the actual dedication.

We were very intentional with the dedication curriculum to share 3 big things with the parents...

1. What the dedication meant.

2. How to be the primary spiritual leader for their child and what that entailed.

3. We shared the Gospel and invited parents who didn't know Jesus to begin a relationship with Him.

The response was amazing.  Parents begin to tell us what a difference the class had made in their lives.  They felt equipped with the practical discipleship tools we shared with them.  Many parents who didn't know Jesus, began a relationship with Him, because of the class.

If you do not currently host a class for parents before they dedicate their children, I want to encourage you to start it up.  You see, when parents have a baby or preschooler, they will open their hearts and listen to what you are sharing with them.  And you will find they are receptive to your teaching and instruction during this time.

One of the most important times to connect with parents is when they are ready to dedicate their child to the Lord.  And if you can invest these parents, while their children are young, you can set them up for success as their child's spiritual leader.

I am excited to announce that the Parent & Child Dedication Class is now available for your ministry.  If you are not hosting a class for parents before your dedications, now is the time to start.  It is critical to have a clear strategy and plan to equip parents during this time.  Or perhaps you currently have a class, but need a fresh, exciting curriculum for it.

This curriculum kit will jump start your child dedication and make it a memorable, life-changing experience for the parents in your ministry. 

As an added bonus, you'll also get two sample child dedication services you can use at the dedication.  Their are two options - one during a weekend service - and another one that can be done outside of a weekend service, in case you do your dedication as a separate event. 

Here are more details...

Parent & Child Dedication includes...

• Teacher's guide (over 40 pages of teaching notes and insight)

• Media presentation files with teaching videos, graphics and music - ready to drop into any presentation software such as PowerPoint, Pro Presenter, Media Shout, Key Note, etc.

• Full color, ready-to-print handbook for parents.

• Ready-to-print resources for parents such as prayer calendars and prayer bookmarks. 

• Class is fun, interactive and keeps parents engaged. 

• Lots of great discussion starters and thought provoking insight. 

• Includes teaching for single parents.

As mentioned, also included is the Parent & Child Dedication Celebration.  Includes...

• A carefully planned format that will help you impact families and create a memorable experience that they'll cherish for the rest of their lives. 

• Dedication certificate template - ready to add your names and print.

• Detailed notes and layout to help you pull off an excellent dedication celebration.

• Media presentation with teaching notes, graphics and music.

• Invitation card template - so families can invite their unchurched friends, neighbors, co-workers and family.

Everything is editable and can be customized to fit your ministry.  And it's available right now as an instant download.  You can get it at this link.  You get both the class and the celebration resources together.

George Barna said, "In the race to a child's heart, the first one there wins."  It is true.  And that's why this Child Dedication resource is so important.  It can be a catalyst for the children and families in your church and community.

Below are some samples from the class.  Check them out for a preview.

Click here to see a sample of the Teacher's notes for the Class: 

Click here to see a sample of the parent handbook:
 
Click here to see a sample of one of the interactive games that parents play:
 
Below are some sample videos from the class.  Click the arrow to watch them full screen.

Can nursery volunteers make a huge impact in children's lives?  At first glance, you might not think so.  Babies can't recite a memory verse back to you, sing a worship song or tell you what they learned from the lesson.  But there is much more going on that can't be seen.

YES...nursery volunteers can make a huge impact in children's lives.  In fact, I believe that nursery volunteers have one of the most important roles in children's ministry.  The early years of a child's life are the most critical.  It's the foundation that shapes a person's life.  Research confirms that the first five years are particularly important for the development of a child's brain, and the first three years are the most critical in shaping a child's brain architecture.  Early experiences provide the base for the brain's organizational development and functioning throughout life.  They have a direct impact on how children develop learning skills as well as social and emotional abilities.