RELEVANT CHILDREN'S MINISTRY

What kind of children's ministry leader do you want to be?  What's the gap between where you are and where you want to be?

No matter how big the gap,  here are steps you can take to get where you want to be as a leader.

KNOW IT
To get where you want to be, you have to be self aware.  Take a hard, honest look in the mirror.  Dig deep into your personality and current leadership skills. 

DEFINE IT
What qualities do you want to improve?  What new skills do you want to acquire?  What strengths do you want to capitalize on?  What people skills do you want to get better at?  Define where you want to be.

MAP IT
Write down specific steps you're going to take to get there.  What books do you need to read?  What courses do you need to take?  What leader do you need to spend time with?  What conference do you need to attend?

REQUEST IT
You've heard the old saying...if you see a turtle on top of a fence post, he had help getting there.  You won't get where you want to be by yourself.  You'll have to request help.  Ask people who know you to give you honest feedback.  Do a 360 review.  Ask friends to point out your blind spots.  You'll never see them alone.  Don't let your insecurities stop you from doing this or you'll never get to where you want to be. 

CONTINUE IT
It takes time, tears and tenacity to improve as a leader.  It will be painful and joyful at the same time.  You will gain ground and then feel like you've lost ground.  Don't give up.  You will improve and you will get better.  

Like never before, we need strong, passionate leaders who are pressing for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus!  Be that leader! 

I love pouring into young children's ministry leaders.  We currently have over 30 interns in our church that we are investing in.

Today I was riding with a couple of our interns and one asked me what I'd do differently if I were just starting out.  Great question.

I shared a few with him and I'd like to share some with you. (if you're over 30, you can read on as well)

Learn to lead adults.
You must be able to lead adults if you're going to be successful in children's ministry.  Sharpen your leadership skills.

Don't take things personal.
People will leave your ministry.  Families will get upset.  Volunteers will quit.  Don't take it personal.  It happens to everyone.

Do a few things well. 
Less is more.  Narrow your ministry programs to a few that are highly effective.

Become good at asking the right questions. 
Good leaders give good answers.  Great leaders ask great questions.

Develop your people skills.  
Children's Ministry is all about relationships.  Hone your people skills.

Read!  Read!  Read!
Read at least 2 books a month.  Pick books that will help you grow spiritually, grow as a leader, grow in your area of ministry, and grow in your relationships. 

Learn how to effectively manage conflict and navigate confrontation.
Study and learn how to use best practices in dealing with conflict and confrontation.

Be yourself.
Learn from others but don't try to be others.  God made you unique for a reason.  He wants to use you, not your version of someone else.

Pace yourself.
Ministry is a marathon, not a sprint.  The best way to succeed in ministry is to stay in ministry.  Find a pace that you can sustain for the long haul. 

Know yourself.
Work on being self-aware.  Know your personality type, your strengths, your weaknesses, and your tendencies.  You can only improve what you know about.

What are some other areas that leaders under 30 should concentrate on?  Share your thoughts with us in the comments section below.

Mistakes are opportunities to learn.  But it's better to not make the mistakes in the first place.

Here's 10 common mistakes Children's Ministry Leaders make.  How do I know?  I've made them all.

Not providing feedback. 
When you don't provide your staff and volunteers with feedback, you are depriving them of an opportunity to improve.

Knowing how to give feedback properly is an art that can be learned.  Read about how to give effective feedback here.

Not making time for your team.
It's easy to get so caught up with the "tasks" that must be accomplished, that you don't make time for people. 

Spend time with the people on your team.  Listen to them.  Pray with them.  Invest in them.  Great leadership is about people first.

Being too "hands off."
In an effort to avoid being a micro-manager, many Children's Ministry Leaders pull away too far and don't provide clear direction and guidance.  Find the balance of empowering others while providing leadership.

Not defining goals and wins. 
When your team doesn't know what they're working toward or what success looks like, they'll lose purpose and passion.  Define clear goals and wins for the entire team as well as for individual positions.

Trying to lead by title.
People don't follow a title.  They follow someone they love and respect.  Don't assume just because you have a title you will be effective.  Forget the title and love, care for, and invest in people.  People will then be drawn toward your leadership.

Being a thermometer instead of a thermostat.
Don't measure the spiritual temperature of your team.  Set the spiritual temperature for your team.  Everything rises and falls on leadership.  Lead.

Not "walking the talk."
Your team doesn't expect you to be perfect, but they do expect you to sincerely practice what you preach.  And when you blow it...admit it, shoulder the responsibility, and ask for their forgiveness.  Their respect for you will grow.

Not delegating.
Delegating does take more work up front, but it pays huge dividends.  It's not what you can do, it's what you can empower others to do.  If you don't learn to delegate, you will become the lid that hinders your ministry from growing. 

Not developing your "people skills."
Ministry is about people.  If you don't learn how to interact with people, navigate conflict, and get along with people....you will struggle in Children's Ministry.  Good people skills will help you build long lasting relationships with your team members.

Making change a surprise instead of a process.
People don't like change...especially if they don't see it coming.  Many zealous Children's Ministry Leaders make changes too quickly and their ministry implodes.  Effectively making change is a process.  It takes skill and wisdom.

Your turn.  What are some other common mistakes do we make as Children's Ministry Leaders?

Share your thoughts with us in the comment section below.

If you want to be a successful Children's Ministry leader, here are 8 skills you need to develop.

Leadership
Successful Children's Ministry leaders do just that.  They lead.  Everything rises and falls on leadership.  They can lead not only children, but adults as well.  They are constantly improving as leaders by reading, listening to podcasts, watching other leaders, asking questions, and more. 

Collaboration
Successful Children's Ministry leaders are collaborators.  They don't plan, create, or make decisions alone.  They know the smartest person in the room is the room.  They know how to work with a team of people to produce the best ideas and solutions.

Team Building
Great Children's Ministry leaders are great team builders.  They know it's not what they can do, but it's what they can empower others to do.  They can enlist and equip volunteers to do the work of the ministry.  

Teachability 
They are very aware that they don't know it all and never will.  They have a humble, teachable spirit.  They ask for feedback.  They even learn from criticism.  They know their weaknesses and strive to grow in those areas.

Organization
They know how to organize.  And if it's not their strength, they either discipline themselves in this area or they gather people around them who can organize.  They and their team pay fantastic attention to details.  They go into meetings, programs, and events organized and prepared.

Communication
Great Children's Ministry leaders are good at communicating.  By communicating, I am not referring to speaking skills, but the ability to communicate information to staff, volunteers, and parents in a timely, proactive manner. 
 
People Skills 
They are good with people.  They know how to build solid relationships.  They know how to navigate a variety of social situations and are also good at resolving conflict.

Vision
Great Children's Ministry leaders are great vision casters.  They can rally people to a cause that is bigger than themselves.  They can share a vision that makes people's heart beat faster.

Okay.  It's your turn.  What other skills do you believe Children's Ministry leaders need?  Share your thoughts with us in the comment section below.