RELEVANT CHILDREN'S MINISTRY

It's Friday, so let's have a little fun.  It's important to take time to relax, laugh and not take ourselves so seriously.

For your enjoyment, here are "20 Things a Children's Ministry Should Never Say to the Lead Pastor."

What's a background check?

During your sermon today, can you tell people they're going to hell if they don't volunteer in children's ministry?

Can I take off Easter weekend?

Do you mind if we use a video clip from the Mad Max movie in children's ministry this weekend?

Can I borrow your new car for a Costco run?

What do you think about me doing a series on Revelation for the preschoolers?

Can I take all my volunteers to Ruth's Chris Steakhouse for an appreciation dinner and charge it to the women's ministry budget?

Can you stop going 5 minutes over on your sermon so the kids don't get restless?

Can next week's offering go to sending me to Hawaii on vacation during VBS?

Can we have a "bring your pet to church" Sunday?

Can we have the worship team start doing motions in the morning service, so the adults can learn how to really worship?

Can we use the baptistry for a pool party for the 5th grade boys' class?

What if we start having the ushers use puppets to help collect the offering?  I think it would help people be more "cheerful" givers.  

Can we repaint the outside of the church with green, blue and hot pink colors so everyone will know our church loves kids?

Can you start using video clips from Disney movies as illustrations in your sermons?

Can we have a "bring your pet to church" Sunday?

Can we tell everyone in the choir that the choir is disbanding so all of them can serve in children's ministry?

Can you announce to the church that anyone who refuses to serve in children's ministry will not be able to participate in communion until they repent and join our team?

There's a culture phenomenon that you need to be aware of.  It's wildly popular among kids.

It's a video game entitled Fortnite Battle Royale.  The game has become an obsession for millions of kids.

How popular is it?  So popular that parents are hiring coaches for their kids to help them get better at the game.  Parents are paying up to $50 hr. for game mentoring.

And you can be sure of one thing - the reason parents are paying for coaches is because their kids are in their ear about it.  Kids are facing peer pressure at school to be a great Fortnite gamer.

If you're not familiar with the game, gamers compete in 100-player groups to be last character standing.  The game is available for PC, Xbox One, Playstation 4, iPhone and Nintendo Switch. 

Players can purchase accessories like gliders, pickaxes to help them win.  The items are purchased with a game currency called V-Bucks.

Stats show that over 125 million people are playing the game and it's on track to bring in 2 billion dollars this year.

Anytime something is this big of a hit, it is important to ask "Why?"  What elements does the game incorporate that are such a big draw for kids?  What can we learn from this as we seek to connect with today's kids?

Let's take an inside look at what elements of the game are drawing so many kids in and see how we can translate some of those elements into our ministries.

Creating a personal story.  Each person's avatar is immersed in a world of travail and adventure. Kids often share with their parents what happened in the game.  The fact that kids can create their own story and see it unfold in the game, is a big draw.

Children's Ministry - God has a special story for each child's life.  We can prepare them for the adventure God has planned for them now and as they grow up.  Encourage kids to pursue and step into the story God has for them.

Part of a community.  The game is designed to be played collectively.  Kids can play with other gamers.

Children's Ministry  - Kids long to belong.  You have the opportunity to help kids experience community through your classes and small groups.  While high-energy, exciting large group times are important, it is not enough by itself.  Kids also need to be in a small group where they are known, loved and invested in.

It's often a family event.  Many parents sit with their kids and take turns playing.  Kids say watching other people play is almost as fun as actually playing themselves.

Children's Ministry - create shared experiences for kids and parents.  This can be anything from shared worship experiences to classes they attend together to activities they do together. 

Kids feel a sense of achievement.  Even when they don't win, getting into the top 5 is satisfying.

Children's Ministry  - Use games and activities that give kids the opportunity to achieve goals.  Have contests that promote friendly competition.  And even if they don't win, create an environment where everyone's achievement can be recognized.

The environment looks kid-friendly.  The world is designed to look cartoonish and welcoming.

Children's Ministry - The physical environment you place kids in matters.  Design your spaces with kids in mind.  Use kid-friendly colors.  An environment with decor that is designed for kids will make a difference in how your ministry is perceived.  Not only by kids, but their parents as well.  The goal should be to hear parents say, "Wow...my kids will love this environment. 

Free.  The game is free to play.  This opens up the game for families who could otherwise not afford to play.

Children's Ministry - Be a place where families feel comfortable coming no matter their financial or social status. 

I believe NOTHING should ever be JUST FOR FUN at church. 

Notice what I didn't say.  I didn't say "kids should never have fun at church." 

I believe church should be a fun, exciting experience for kids.  I believe we should create irresistible environments that are so much fun, that kids wake their parents up on Sunday morning, excited about going to church. 

What I did say is nothing should ever be just for fun at church.  In other words, every single bit of "fun" we offer at church should have a purpose.  

You see, we only have a small window of time to teach, encourage and invest in kids while they are at church.  With attendance patterns declining and shorter services, every single minute we have with kids at church must matter. 

Every single minute we plan for kids at church should have an underlying purpose. 

Yes, we should have lots of fun games for kids at church.  But every game should have a purpose.   The purpose might be setting up discussion questions about the teaching point.  The purpose might be to help kids apply the lesson.  The purpose might be to review the lesson.

Yes, we should have lots of fun crafts for kids at church.  But again, every craft should have a purpose.  The purpose might be to give parents a discussion starter about the lesson for home.  The purpose might be to set up the key point of the lesson.  The purpose might be to help kids memorize a Bible verse.

Yes, we should have fun activities for kids while they are waiting for the class to start.  But every activity should have a purpose.  The purpose might be to make new kids feel welcomed and comfortable.  The purpose might be help small group leaders deepen their relational connections with kids.

The bottom line is this - fun should not be the end result of what we do at church.  The end result should be to point kids to Jesus and help them learn more about God's Word. 

Fun is simply a tool we use to accomplish this.

Make sure there is a purpose for your play.

Make sure there is a focus for your fun.

Make sure there is a scope and sequence behind your silliness.

Stand by the exit door of your ministry this weekend and listen as parents are leaving with their children.  The majority of the time, you will hear two questions.

Question #1 - Did you have fun today? 

Question #2 - What did you learn about?

If you are being effective, you will hear kids give a clear answer to BOTH of those questions. 

Hearing a "yes" to "Did you have fun today?" is a must if you want to see kids engaged at church.  But if kids can't answer question 2, then the "yes" to question 1 is shallow and won't be life-changing. 

Every single hour...every single minute...every single second you have with kids at church should be planned and focused.   Nothing...nothing...nothing should ever be "just for fun" at church.

I want to encourage you to look at your curriculum.  Make sure every part of your lesson has a clear purpose.

If you're looking for curriculum that is laser focused and uses fun to teach kids to love Jesus and follow Him, check out these series.  There is a year's worth of curriculum that gives kids a solid faith foundation.

Here's 20 things you'll never regret doing as a children's ministry leader.

1. Sharing the Gospel with kids and families. There is nothing more important.

2. Leading kids in worship.  The purity of their worship must make God smile.

3. Telling a volunteer "thank you."  Your words remind them that they matter and what they do matters.

4. Getting down on one knee to look into the eyes of a smiling preschooler.  It's one of the best things on earth.

5. Going to the hospital to pray with a family.  They won't remember what you said, but they will always remember you were there.

6. Helping a new family feel welcome.  What a joy to be Jesus' arms of love embracing them.

7. Spending money out of your own pocket to show volunteers you appreciate them.  It's one of the best investments you can make. 

8. Helping kids see that God has great plans for their life.  The seed that you plant will help them walk into their destiny.

9. Taking time to pray with a child who is going through a tough time.  Jesus took time to personally minister to children.  When you pray with a child, you're doing what matters to Jesus.

10. Believing in a volunteer and helping them discover the gifts God has placed in them.  Who you help volunteers become outweighs what you help them do.

11. Creating a place where families who are far from God can come and discover God's grace.  It doesn't get any better than seeing a family changed forever by God's love.

12. Giving a child his or her first Bible.  What a privilege to place a love letter from God into a child's hands.

13. Providing parents with the tools, resources and confidence they need to lead their children spiritually.  When you influence parents, you influence kids exponentially.

14. Baptizing someone who has stepped across the line of faith.  It's worth getting wet for every time.

15. Allowing kids to be kids and have fun at church.  They'll grow up loving to be at church.

16. Spending time with your volunteers outside of serving.  This is where lasting relationships are formed.

17. Staying at one place long enough to see kids grow up and keep serving God as adults.  You'll feel old, but it's worth every grey hair you have to color.

18. Looking in the nursery and smiling at a baby.  There is nothing more precious.  It will make your day every time.

19. Saying "yes" when it would have been easier to say "no."  At the end of the second mile is where you'll find the greatest rewards. 

20. Helping young parents dedicate their child to God.  It's awesome to be able to share in the joy and prayers of young parents as they dedicate their child to God

The number one question parents asked their kids when they picked them up from your children's ministry this past weekend was, "Did you have fun today?"

Did you have fun today?

At first glance, it may seem like a shallow question, but take a closer look and you'll see it's really one of the deepest questions a parent can ask.

Why?  Because what they are really asking is this.

"Did they capture your attention today?"

"Did they teach you anything that is relevant to your life?"

"Were you engaged today?"

"Did you feel loved and cared for today?"

"Did you have a good experience?"

Want to know how effective your children's ministry is?  Stand by the exit door and watch how the majority of kids respond when their parents ask them that question.  If they are responding with a shrug and a half-hearted "yeah," then it's an indicator some major changes are needed.

Here's some ways to see kids respond with a smile and "Yes...I had a blast."

10 Reasons Kids Should Play at Church

Why Kids Are Fidgeting in Your Ministry

Hey Children's Ministry Leaders...Make It Fun

Want to Find Out If Kids Like Coming to Your Church? Ask Them These Two Words

Did you know that 97% of kids spend an average of 10 hours a week playing video games?  Kids love games.

It's important for kids to play games at church.  Here's 5 reasons why.

1. Games create an optimal learning environment.  Games place kids in the zone of proximal development.

This means they are placed in a situation beyond what they can already do, but not so difficult that they can’t do it with guidance, persistence, and encouragement.  In other words, they are placed between what they already know and what they are being challenged to learn.  In this zone, kids can effectively learn God's Word.

2.  Games help kids learn to persist.  Games teach kids not to give up but to keep going even when they fail. 

3.  Games can help simulate real life situations that help kids practice applying God's Word to their life.  It's vital that kids apply God's Word to their every day life.  Through games you can place kids in real-life situations where they have to live out what they've just learned.

4. Games help make church fun.  Games are fun.  Each time we conquer a game, we get a shot of dopamine in our brains which stimulates good feelings.  Games will bring excitement to your children's ministry.

5. Games help kids remember the lesson.  Repetition is a key to learning.  Review games help kids repeat back what you've taught them. 

The floor is yours.  Do you play games at church?  How do you use them?  What tips do you have playing games at church?  Is there a site or resource you use to find games?  Share with us in the comment section below.