RELEVANT CHILDREN'S MINISTRY

 As we approach 2019, do you need to invest in yourself?

The most challenging person you will lead in the coming year will be the person you look at in the mirror each day.  Yourself.

Often as children's ministry leaders, we spend all of our time investing in others.  And that's a good thing.  In fact, it's what you are called to do - to equip your team for the work of the ministry.

But when was the last time you invested in yourself?
When was the last time you carved out some time to improve as a children's ministry leader?

Do you want to have more leadership influence with the team you lead?

Do you want your ministry to grow and flourish?

Are you looking for someone to help you become a better leadership minister?

Do you need someone to help you navigate and face challenges you are facing?

Rick Warren said this about leading a ministry -

Can you relate?  Then Advance Coaching is for you.  Led by Dale Hudson, you will grow as a leader and children's ministry staff member or volunteer.  Dale is one of the leading voices and leaders in children's ministry.  Whether it's your first year or 20th year in ministry, he can help you and your ministry get to the next level.  Dale has led in churches of all sizes, ranging from 100 to 28,000 in weekend attendances.  He also built and led a volunteer team of over 2,600 people.

When you join us for the Advance experience,  you get...

• 6 months of coaching.  Next session starts in January of 2019.  
• Monthly coaching session.
• Personalized growth plan. 
• Copy of all of Dale's books.
• Online support.

If you'd like to get more info. about the coaching program, you can go to this page for applications, more details, etc. 

The next group starts in January.  The deadline to apply is Dec.15th.  There is limited space, so apply now.  No matter the size of your ministry, you will gain great insight and personal growth in the program.  We have churches from 100 to 17,000 who have participated. 

Here's a few testimonies from leaders who have went through the Advance program. 

I am so thankful for the coaching experience I was able to have with Dale Hudson.  I have learned tools that will help with leadership, growth and structure.  I would highly recommend anyone in ministry to take part in this amazing experience. 
Michelle Clary, 5 Points Church

Can you teach an "old dog" new tricks?  Dale did!  Having worked in children's ministry for almost two decades, I have a lot of experience.  Basically that means I am good at some things and avoid the rest.  If you are willing to learn, Dale can help you with the rest. 
Joel Smith, First Colony Church of Christ

Dale does a great job of lining up the essentials of children's ministry to teach you the most important, often overlooked, aspects of ministry. While all of my previous training had been "on the job," this session with Dale really solidified all that knowledge and has also helped me have some tangible aspects to measure.  I was able to use this course to put some  processes in placea nd it allowed me to step back and create an over-aching plan for the ministry. 
Erin Althaus 
West Market Church 

I found the Advance program very helpful!  I'm convinced everyone can get something out of it - both those with formal training and those without. If you are a children's ministry leader,  you'll be glad you were a part.  If you're a senior pastor, you should have your kid's pastor participate. 
Eric Gayer
Lifegate Church 

Come join us and take your leadership and ministry to the next level.

A few weeks ago,  I was speaking in the weekend services at a church in the Tampa area.  The church has one service on Saturday and two on Sunday.  I had just finished speaking at the first service on Sunday and was interacting with some of the people who had attended.  A lady approached me and whispered to me, "I need to tell you something."

Okay.  I thought she might be getting ready to tell me about something going on in her life, ask a question or comment on something I said during the message.  But here's what she said.

"You still have the sales tag on your coat."

"Where?" I said.

"Under your arm.  I saw it when you were speaking."

My heart skipped a beat.  I raised my arm and sure enough...there was the sales tag.  I had spoke Saturday night and Sunday morning with a sales tag hanging out of my coat!  I felt like an idiot!  I thanked her and obviously quickly removed the tag.  Even thought it was embarrassing at the the moment, I look back and have to laugh at myself.

The sales tag taught me a lesson that you might be able to identify with as well. 

You see...I have weaknesses that I cannot see.  Blind spots.  That's why they call them blind spots, right?  I can't correct what I can't see.  That's why I must have trusted friends who will be brutally honest and point them out to me. 

Effective leaders welcome critique and see it as a gift rather than a criticism.  If you're like me, when someone approaches me and begins to point out one of my weaknesses, I naturally tense up and and become defensive internally.  I have to resist this and see the critique as a gift that will make me a better leader and person.

Every criticism, critique and bit of feedback you receive, can make you better if you'll make this adjustment and see it as a gift.  Even if it is off base and not totally true, there is usually still a nugget of truth you can grab and use to help you improve as a leader.  

If you'll make this shift, it will totally change your attitude about critique and criticism.  Don't let your insecurities, pride or stubbornness rob you of an opportunity to grow as a leader.

Effective leaders take the initiative and ask people to help them see their blind spots.  If I had asked a friend or family member to check me before I went up to speak, I could have avoided an embarrassing situation. 

Don't sit back and hope someone will point out your blind spots.  Have a group of trusted friends who will be brutally honest with you and will help you grow as a leader through feedback.

Asking these type of questions will give you the knowledge you need to grow. 

• What part of my personality can be offensive at times?
• What would you change in my message that will make it more effective?
• What is one thing I can do to be a better leader?
• What is something I should stop doing to be a better leader?

Effective leaders are intentional about working on their weaknesses.  Guess what?  You haven't arrived as a leader and neither have I.  And we never will.  That's why we must continue to take the feedback we get and use it to continually grow as a leader.  Effective leaders are always in school.  They are always growing.  Always looking for ways to get better.

What is the "sales tag" that is in your life and leadership right now?  Get some help seeing it and then you can remove it.  Remove it and you'll be more effective as a leader. 

There are three voices you should be listening to as a leader.

The first is the voice of the Holy Spirit.  The Bible tells us this in John 16:13...

"When the Spirit of truth comes, He will guide you into all truth..."

The Holy Spirit can guide you as a leader.  He can give you wisdom as a leader.  He can comfort you when you are discouraged.  He convicts you when you do wrong.  He can empower you.  He can help you understand Scripture.  He can help you pray.  He can strengthen you.  

What a gift of grace the Holy Spirit is.  As a leader, you don't have to make decisions alone.  You don't have to lead in your own strength.  You don't have to carry the weight of leadership alone.  You don't have to give advice alone.  You don't have to motivate alone.  

Are you listening to the voice of the Holy Spirit?  His voice is gentle and quiet.   You can hear Him when you pull away from the noise of life and listen in the stillness and solitude of prayer. 

The second voice you should be listening to is the voice of people who encourage you.  Who are the people in your corner?  Who are the people who speak life into you?  Who are the people who lift your spirits with their words?  

Years ago, as a young leader who was in way over his head, I'll never forget the four words an encourager spoke into my life.  He said, "I believe in you!"  Wow!  What an impact it had in my life!  When I got discouraged, I listened to those words.  When I was overwhelmed, I listened to those words,  When I was lacking confidence, I listened to those words  When others doubted me, I listened to those words.

Make sure as a leader that you are listening to the voice of encouragement.  Trust me...you'll need it. 

The third voice you should be listening to as a leader is the voice of critics.  This is the hardest voice to listen to, isn't it?  With leadership comes criticism.  The only way to not be criticized is to do nothing.  But that's not you. You are a leader.  

Here's a mindset to adopt about criticism.  See criticism as a gift.  That's right, a gift.  A gift that can help you identify blind spots.  A gift that you can learn from.  A gift that can keep you growing.  A gift that can help you be a better leader.   No matter how unfounded or off-base a criticism is, you can learn something from it. 

The natural action is to turn a deaf ear to criticism.  But when you do this, you are missing out on a great growth opportunity.  Instead of taking the bricks criticism hands you and building a wall with them, take them and build your leadership.  

As a leader, are you listening to the voice of the Holy Spirit, the voice of encouragement and the voice of criticism?

Great leaders don't think they're great.  They have a humble spirit that helps them see not how much they know, but how much they don't know.

You see...most leaders overate themselves.  They think they are better than they really are.  An interesting study was done about this.  Over 3,000 leaders were asked to rate their effectiveness as a leader.  The people they lead also rated their effectiveness. 

The leaders who overrated their leadership skills were underrated by those they lead.  The leaders who underrated their leadership skills were rated as above average by those they lead.  This finding is supported by a study by two Cornell psychologists who documented that incompetent leaders fail to recognize their own deficiencies and don't recognize other people's skills. 

I believe the first step to becoming a great leader is realizing you are not a great leader.  This opens the door for you to improve and develop as a leader. 

Some areas people tend to overrate themselves in as leaders are...

• Listening skills.  Most leaders are not as good as listeners as they think they are.  Once you acknowledge you need to grow in this area, you can become a better listener by increasing your desire to understand what people are saying and taking time to hear about the needs and concerns of others. 

• Giving credit to others.  When you shine the spotlight on others instead of yourself and recognize and praise others, it helps you become a better leader. 

• Collaboration.  Ineffective leaders are competitive.  Great leaders are collaborative.  Are you in competition for praise, resources and promotion?

• Investing in others.  Great leaders develop those around them.  They provide feedback that helps those they lead improve.  And they provide the feedback in an empowering, positive way instead of with criticism.

No matter where you are as a leader, you can always get better.  And it starts with accessing where you are now.  For a true assessment, ask those you lead to anonymously access where you are as a leader.  This takes courage, but will give you an honest perspective and help you see your blind spots. 

Remember, if you think you've arrived as a leader, you're right.  But where you've arrived is where you will stay.  Don't arrive...keep growing.

Kids want to know that they matter to someone.  They want to know that someone cares about them and is taking a personal interest in them.

If you really want to see your children's ministry impact kids' lives, then you've got to make it personal.  Here's some ways to do that.

Make sure every child hears someone say their name every time they are at church.  No matter how many kids attend your ministry, this can happen if you use name tags.  Be intentional about saying kids' names when they are checking in, are inside the room and are leaving.

Make sure every child has a caring leader who knows them.  Every child should have at least one leader who is investing in their life.  Someone they look forward to seeing at church.  Someone who knows when they're not there and lets them know they were missed.  This can be accomplished by placing kids in small groups, having leaders who are consistent and being intentional about building relationships with the kids.

Make your communication personal.  Remember how you feel when you get a generic email, note or letter that's not personally addressed to you?  It's very cold and impersonal, isn't it?  And normally it's quickly discarded.  But when you receive a personal, handwritten note it's different, isn't it?  It makes you feel valued.  When you send correspondence, personalize it.  It makes a huge difference.

Your turn.  The floor is yours.  How do you make your children's ministry personal for kids?  Share your ideas and thoughts with everyone in the comment section below.

How do you see complainers?  As antagonists?  As trouble-makers?  As jerks?  As naysayers?   As negative people?  As the opposition?

How you view complainers dictates how you respond to them.  If you take it personal when they complain, you'll think they are saying, "you're not a good leader" or "your ideas stink" or "you're wrong."

But if you see them as someone who can help you improve the ministry, you will respond to them differently.  Here's how to see complainers in a new light.

Understand that opposition is part of change and growth.  Push past your personal reactions to those who complain and realize that opposition will help you assess the quality of ideas, see different approaches and help you make high-quality decisions.

Be proactive in seeking out complainers.  Each time you have a new change or major initiative coming, ask people to tell you why you shouldn't do it.  By doing this, you will begin to see opposition as a regular and important part of the decision-making process. 

Ask those who are normally "yes" people to think of and share an opposing view.  One characteristic of highly effective teams is their freedom to explore all sides and views of an idea or initiative.  Successful teams have conflict and disagreement.  Help people on your team build the skill and willingness to offer opposing views.

Train yourself to not instantly resist the complainer.  Even if you know your position is right, stop and listen, consider and evaluate the opposing idea.

See the complainer as a gift.  Normally the complainer doesn't have bad intentions.  They're usually trying to say something that they believe is for the good of the team.  Shift your anger to appreciation for the complainer.  If no one brings opposing views, then the team can become unbalanced.  They are helping the team get better.

Provide feedback for the complainer.  If the complainer is bringing the opposition with an attitude or spirit that is damaging, it is vital to help him or her learn to offer opposing views with skill and tact.  Encourage him or her to also share comments when they are in agreement, so they are seen as balanced.

Seeing complainers in this new light will make you a better leader and decision maker.

Over the years, I've noticed a simple step that sets great leaders apart.  Whether it's a pastor or children's director or administrative assistant or you name the role...there's something they do that enables them to get things done.

It seems so simple you'd think everyone does it...but they don't.  

Here it is - THEY WRITE IT DOWN. 

Whether they are given a task or agree to take on an assignment or make a promise or say they'll follow up on something...THEY STOP RIGHT THEN AND THERE AND MAKE THEMSELVES A NOTE ABOUT IT. 

Countless times, I have watched people be given a verbal assignment and not write it down.  Sure enough...they forget and it doesn't get done.  Countless times, I have seen someone promise a volunteer or co-worker that they'd take care of something and not write it down.  And later, when the person asks them about it, they embarrassingly say, "Oh...sorry...I forgot."  That's what average leaders do.

But if you want to be an extraordinary leader...if you want to be a leader that people know they can count on...if you want to be a leader that gets stuff done...then do the following.

1. Never trust your memory.
2. Always write it down.  Immediately.
3. Turn your notes into a prioritized task list.
4. Get it done.

Write things down...this one simple step will set you apart as a leader!  

There's a simple skill that will instantly make you a better leader.  It has been called the single most important and underrated leadership skill.

The skill?  LISTENING.

This means you focus less on yourself and more on other people.  When you walk into a room, make it "there you are" instead of "here I am."  It's more important to be interested than it is to be interesting.  

Practice active listening.  This means focusing on what the other person is saying instead of thinking about what you want to say next.  That's not always easy.  We have things we want to say and our natural inclination is to talk about those things.

But when you talk less and listen more, people will want to follow you.  And when you allow people to talk about themselves, they will feel more fondly about you as a leader.   

What sets childrens' ministries apart, the ministries where volunteers love to serve and kids and families' lives are being changed, is PASSION.

Do you want your ministry to be full of passion?  Here's how to build passion in your ministry.

Have something worth being passionate about. 
Let me re-word that. You already have something worth being passionate about...the Gospel.  There is no greater cause.

The key is constantly helping people make the connection between their serving role and the greater purpose.  Pointing people to the purpose will ignite passion.  

Remember passion is caught more than it is taught.  The passion level of your ministry is a mirror of your passion as a leader.  Show your passion...to the point where at times you get very emotional about it.  When was the last time your volunteers saw tears running down your face as you shared your heart for the mission?  When was the last time your earnest prayers echoed through the hallways of your ministry?  When was the last time you fasted for the families of your community?  If you want to raise the passion level of your ministry, then start with yourself.

Surround yourself with passionate people.  When you are passionate, you will attract passionate people.  Surround yourself with them.  There will always be people who feel their calling in life is to throw cold water on the fire.  Be kind to them...but don't let them get close.  If you do, they will douse the flames.  Bring people in close whose passion will encourage and inspire you.  

Fan the flames.  The natural tendency of passion is to wane.  Keep the passion burning by revisiting the purpose often.  Celebrate the passion.  Share stories of the passion.  Honor those who show passion.  

Never be satisfied.  The opposite of passion is complacency.  Keep your passion by staying in growth mode.  Always be reading, stretching, asking questions and seeking God for more. 

When you have passion, you won't have to tell people.  Passion is very evident.  People know it when they see it.

Leadership is about more than making decisions, giving good speeches or coming up with great plans.

Leadership is about bringing purpose. It's rallying people to something that's bigger than themselves.

How do great leaders bring purpose?

They move beyond telling people what to do and help people see "why" what they're asking them to do is worth doing.

They help nursery volunteers see that they're helping parents find Christ.  They help preschool volunteers see that they're investing in kids' lives at the most critical time.  They help greeters see that they're preaching a sermon with their smile and "welcome."  They help elementary volunteers see that they're help kids begin a relationship with Jesus.

Great leaders also bring purpose by keeping people focused on it.  The natural tendency is to get bogged down in the minutia and lose sight of the purpose.  A great leader constantly takes people back to the purpose.

Great leaders bring purpose by sharing the stories.  They show people how the purpose is changing people's lives.

We have the greatest purpose in the world...sharing the Gospel with boys, girls, moms and dads. 

If you want to be a great leader...point people to the purpose, keep people focused on the purpose and tell the stories of the purpose being fulfilled.

What causes a leader to stop growing?  In this infograph, we share 10 reasons.  Are any of these currently hindering you from growing?
If you'd like a copy of this infograph as a .jpg, you can email me at dalehudsoncm2@gmail.com.

I am often asked by younger leaders, "How do I lead people who are older and more experienced than I am?"

Now that I'm in my late 40's and have been leading for over 26 years, I don't face that situation quite as often.  But I can definitely relate to it.  Seems just yesterday, I was a young leader interacting with people who had been doing ministry longer than I had been alive.

Looking back, here's some tips I wish I'd known.  I trust it will be a help to younger leaders who are reading this as well as older leaders who want to encourage the next generation.

Create teamwork through collaboration.  Since you are younger and less experienced, people will not always trust your ideas and opinions.  The key to overcoming this is collaboration.  Don't just shove ideas and initiatives down from the top.  Instead, gather ideas and opinions from people, work through them together and then move forward with what rises to the top.  Collaboration will help you create the teamwork you need in place as a young leader. 

Gain knowledge through feedback.  Your lack of experience will naturally lead to people questioning your expertise, skill and knowledge.  Make this an advantage instead of a disadvantage through feedback.  Be intentional about asking for feedback about your performance and seek ways to digest and implement it.  Older leaders will not think less of you for this.  In fact, it will cause them to respect you and follow you. 

Build trust through integrity.  Older leaders will struggle to see you as a role model since you don't have a proven track record.  Start building a track record people can trust by walking your talk, keeping your promises and being honest. 

Deepen relationships through care.  Older leaders will not open their heart to you because of your title.  They will open their heart to your leadership because they know you care about them.  Show them you care by taking an interest in them personally and investing time in them.  Show them you care more about them as a person than about what they do.

Encourage through inspiration.  Sometimes older leaders struggle with complacency, discouragement and even burnout.  As a young leader, you can tap into the excitement and energy of your youth to inspire them.  Help them break out of the box they may be in and help them stretch for more.

Honor the past while pointing to the future.  Older leaders tend to reflect on the past.  This will be heard in statements like "we've always done it that way" or "we tried something like that and it didn't work" or  "we don't like change" or "remember how great it was when."

If you disregard or refuse to honor the past, older leaders will not follow you into the future.  The future is built on a foundation of gratitude for the past.

The floor is yours. 
Are you a young leader?  
What are you thoughts?  
What other questions do you have?
Are you an older leader?  
What other advice do you have for younger leaders?  
Share your thoughts in the comment section below.

One of the most important aspects of ministry is developing leaders.

Effective leaders know they can only do so much flying solo and develop other leaders to expand the work of the ministry.  They also know they won't be here forever and they prepare successors to carry on the ministry after they're gone.

Moses modeled this with Joshua.  Jesus modeled this with His disciples.  Paul modeled this with Timothy.  

When you develop leaders, you multiply your influence and insure the ministry will flourish after you're gone.

So the question is...how is this done?  How do you effectively find, mentor and equip people to be leaders?  Recently, I was reading a passage in the Bible and God showed me a step-by-step guide for this.  It's a guide that can help you develop the leaders you need.

It's found in I Kings 19 & 2 Kings 2.

So Elijah went from there and found Elisha son of Shaphat.  He was plowing with twelve yoke of oxen, and he himself was driving the twelfth pair.  Elijah went up to him and threw his cloak around him.  Elisha then left his oxen and ran after Elijah. “Let me kiss my father and mother goodbye,” he said, “and then I will come with you.”

“Go back,” Elijah replied. “What have I done to you?  So Elisha left him and went back.  He took his yoke of oxen and slaughtered them.  He burned the plowing equipment to cook the meat and gave it to the people, and they ate.  Then he set out to follow Elijah and became his servant.


The company of the prophets from Jericho, who were watching, said, “The spirit of Elijah is resting on Elisha.”

Elijah was a mighty prophet of God.  He was a bold prophet.  He was an anointed prophet.  He stood alone against 850 of Baal's false prophets and saw God reign down fire from heaven to bring a great victory.  As Elijah began to prepare for his transition, he began to look for someone he could mentor and raise up to be the next prophet of God.  Someone that he could hand down his cloak to.  His cloak represented the ministry and anointing God had placed upon Him.

Elijah successfully handed down his anointing and ministry to Elisha.  It culminating with his cloak falling off his back and into Elisha's grasp.

Just like Elijah, you and I are called to hand down to others the leadership and ministry God has entrusted us with.

From Elijah's example, here are the keys to a successful hand-me-down.

I. Hand-Me-Downs involve THINKING
Human nature skews us toward build our own kingdom.  We want the spotlight...the glory...the praise and accolades.  What if the person we develop outshines us?  What if they take the ministry farther than we could?

But a hand-me-down means you think differently.  Instead, you die to yourself and esteem others better than yourself.  You begin to live Philippians 2:3 which says, "Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit.  Rather, in humility esteem others above yourself."

Elijah reached the point where it wasn't about him.  It was about the mission.  He realized that what he was part of was bigger than the part he played.

A successful hand-me-down starts first with you.  Are you willing to adjust your thinking and say, "It's not about me?"  Are you willing to help others rise above you?  Are you willing to let others go farther than you have gone?

II. Hand-Me-Downs involve THROWING 
If you look back up at the passage, you'll notice that Elijah went and found Elisha and threw his cloak around him.  Developing leaders requires intentionality.  You have to go to the right person and make the ask.

The big question...how do you know who the right person is?  The answers can be found in the passage.  Here's what to look for when you're searching for someone to invest in.

• Look for someone who wants to fulfill God's will for their life.  The person should have a sense of calling.  Notice how Elisha engaged and begin following Elijah.  He was ready to find the destiny God had for him. 

• Look for someone who is all in.  Elisha was willing to leave his family, financial security and home to follow God's call.  Look for someone who is already committed.  Look for someone who already goes the second mile.  Look for someone who is already serving faithfully. 

• Look for someone who is willing to pay the price.  As referenced above, Elisha was willing to let go of his financial livelihood to fulfill God's destiny for his life.  He slaughtered his oxen and burned his plowing equipment.  He made it clear there was no turning back.

• Look for someone who is willing to serve first.  Notice what it says about Elisha at the end of chapter 19.  It says "he set out to follow Elijah and a serve him.  Great leaders are great followers first.  Look for someone who has a teachable spirit.  If the person is not teachable, they will not be usable.  In addition, look for someone who is more concerned about serving others than they are about having a title.  

• Look for someone who has what can't be taught.  These are things like character, integrity, passion and motivation.  People either have them or they don't.  Notice how Elisha was self-motivated.  He asked for a double portion of the anointing that was on Elijah's life. 

• Look for the person who emerges from the crowd.  There were many young prophets at the time.  But it was Elisha that emerged from the crowd as the obvious choice.  Raising up a leader is not the time for charity cases.  Love everyone equally, but invest selectively.  In other words, you must be selective in who you mentor and develop as a leader.

III.  Hand-Me-Downs involve TRAINING
Elijah took Elisha with him on the journey and trained him along the way.  It takes work to develop a leader.  It takes lots of teaching...showing...providing feedback...
mentoring...talking...praying and investing. 

Is it faster to do ministry by yourself?  Yes.  But the ministry will go farther if you bring someone with you. 

IV.  Hand-Me-Downs involve TIMING
The hand-me-down wasn't done immediately.  Timing is important in such matters.  God's timing arrived one day as they stood together by the Jordan River.  As Elijah was caught up into the heavens his cloak was left for Elisha.  The transfer was made.  The hand-me-down was complete.

Timing is important in your hand-me-down as well.  A premature hand-me-down can result in the successor not being prepared or ready to lead.  An overdue hand-me-
down can result in stagnation and discouragement.

The right timing comes from God's wisdom and guidance being infused into process.

V.  Hand-Me-Downs involve THRIVING
When you develop leaders effectively, the ministry will thrive.  Elijah did 14 miracles.  Guess how many Elisha did?  28.  Exactly double...right in line with the double portion he had asked for.  I can't help but think that Elijah looked down from heaven and rejoiced.

Our prayer should be that the leaders we develop will make the ministry twice as good as we could have alone...that they will reach twice as many people...that they will see twice as many miracles...that they will see twice as many blessings...that they will be twice as good as leaders as we were.

A truly effective hand-me-down results in the ministry thriving instead of just surviving!

Closing Thoughts...
Who will you throw your cloak upon?  Who will you raise up to lead with you now and later after you are gone?  Who is your Elisha?

Begin THINKING God's kingdom...not your kingdom.
Start THROWING your cloak on the person God wants you to develop.
Pour yourself into TRAINING that person.
In God's TIMING, advance them.
Watch the ministry begin THRIVING.

There's a habit that's key to pushing yourself mentally and physically.  Numerous studies show that it's one of the most important habits you can develop to transform your life.

It will make you healthier, happier, and better able to sleep; it can boost your memory, concentration, and mental sharpness.

What is the habit?  EXERCISE

High level leaders know this and exercise.  Here are a few examples...

• The President exercises 6 days a week, 45 minutes a day.
• Richard Branson swims, does rock climbing, running, and weightlifting.  He says it gives him at least four additional hours of productivity each day.
• Anna Wintour, editor-in-chief of American Vogue, wakes up every morning at 5:45 a.m. to play tennis.
• Panera Bread CEO, Ron Shaich, confessed to being "a couch potato," but said he "made a commitment to lose weight and increase his fitness level" in his 50s to "keep up mentally and physically with the demands of a growing business."  To force himself to work out, Shaich employs a trainer. The workout consists of running or swimming in his indoor or outdoor pool for one hour, two to three times a week. 
• Nick Woodman, CEO of Go Pro, is an avid surfer, snowboarder, and mountain biker.
• Frits van Paaschen, chief of Starwood Hotels & Resorts, gets up at 6:00 am to run 10 miles every day.
• Michael Corbat, CEO of Citigroup, works out with weights to stay sharp.
• Kat Cole, CEO of Focus Brands, gets up at 5:30 am to exercise.
• Aaron Patzer, founder of mint.com, lifts weights, runs, and rock climbs to stay fit.

I can personally attest to the difference exercise makes.  It has helped me lose 50 lbs., relieves stress, helps me sleep better and gives me energy.  Do I enjoy it?  Not really, but 6 days a week I hit the gym.  The benefits are worth maintaining the habit.

If you aren't exercising, I want to encourage you to consider starting.  You'll be glad you did. 

If you exercise, inspire others to start by listing what you do in the comment section below.

Do people respect you as a leader?  If you're counting on a title to bring you respect, you will be sadly disappointed.  While a title may bring you a little respect, it is the lowest form of respect.

You see, respect is earned.  It's not about a title.  When people respect you only because of the authority of your title, they will give you minimum effort.

So how do you earn respect?  Here's some tested and proven ways to earn the respect of those you have been asked to lead and influence.

Be passionate about the mission of the ministry.  People are drawn to passionate people.  Be a thermostat instead of a thermometer.  Set the tone for the ministry through a passionate commitment to the mission.  And not only talk the mission...live it out.  If you talk about inviting new people to join the team, be the first one out there asking people to join.  Passion is lighting up the ministry mission through your actions.

Be relational.  When people know you care about them, they will respect you.  True respect is earned up close and personal...not from a distance. 

Be honest about what you don't know.  That may sound counter-productive, but it's not.  When you are open about what you don't know and ask people to help you in those areas, they will respect you.  You don't have to know it all to gain respect...you simply have to know when to ask for help.

Be a team player.  Collaborators earn respect.  Plain and simple. 

Be quick to give credit to others.  How does a great coach gain respect?  By helping his players develop and shine.  You will gain respect not by putting yourself in the spotlight, but by putting others in the spotlight.  Your respect will be earned by helping others succeed. 

Your turn.  What are some other ways to gain respect as a leader?  Share with us in the comment section below.

There are lots of good children's ministry leaders.  But what causes a person to move from being a "good" children's ministry leader to being a "great" children's ministry leader?  Here are some of the indicators.

A good children's ministry leader produces volunteers who serve because they are needed...a great children's ministry leader produces volunteers who serve because it's their passion.

A good children's ministry leader produces doers...a great children's ministry leader produces leaders.

A good children's ministry leader connects with kids...a great children's ministry leader connects with kids and parents.

A good children's ministry leader keeps the front of the stage clean...a great children's ministry leader keeps the front and back of the stage clean.

A good children's ministry leader reaches kids...a great children's ministry leader reaches families.

A good children's ministry leader is in the spotlight...a great children's ministry leader puts others in the spotlight.

A good children's ministry leader is busy...a great children's ministry leader is effective.

A good children's ministry leader needs the pastor's encouragement...a great children's ministry leader encourages the pastor.

A good children's ministry leader knows how much he or she knows...a great children's ministry leader knows how much he or she doesn't know.

A good children's ministry leader accepts feedback...a great children's ministry leader asks for feedback.

A good children's ministry leader leads with his or her title...a great children's ministry leader leads through relationship.

A good children's ministry leader mandates...a great children's ministry leader motivates.

A good children's ministry leader develops him/herself...a great children's ministry leader develops those around them.

A good children's ministry leader is committed to okay...a great children's ministry leader is committed to excellence.

A good children's ministry leader has confidence...a great children's ministry leader has Godfidence.

A good children's ministry leader disciples kids...a great children's ministry equips parents to disciple their kids.

A good children's ministry leader maintains the ministry...a great children's ministry leader grows the ministry.

A good children's ministry leader teaches kids what the Bible says...a great children's ministry leader teaches kids how to apply what the Bible says.

A good children's ministry leader impacts the children's ministry...a great children's ministry leader impacts the entire church.

A good children's ministry leader fulfills his or her vision for the children's ministry...a great children's ministry leader fulfills the lead pastor's vision for the children's ministry.

A good children's ministry leader places volunteers where he or she needs them...a great children's ministry leader places volunteers where they need to be.

The floor is yours.  What are some other characteristics of great children's ministry leaders?  Share your thoughts with us in the comment section below.

I am currently mentoring a college student in our ministry who is an up and coming children's ministry leader.  He has the calling of God on his life and is eager to grow and learn.  He's just started in a part-time staff role and I believe down the road will be the director of one of our campuses.

This summer, we are focusing on three key areas of growth for him.  These are essentials that I would encourage any young or new children's ministry leader to focus on.

Leading Volunteers and Building Teams
I believe one of the keys to success in children's ministry is building and leading volunteers.  Successful children's ministry leaders are first and foremost team builders.  We will be reading and discussing the book "The New Breed:  Understanding and Equipping 21st Century Volunteers."  He will also be getting hands on ministry experience enlisting, equipping and empowering volunteers.

People Skills - Specifically Conflict Resolution and How to Have Hard Conversations
Ministry is all about people.  If you want to be successful in children's ministry, one of the best things you can do is sharpen your people skills.  This will help you effectively talk with parents, resolve conflict between volunteers and know how to respond to criticism.  We will be reading and discussing the book "How to Have That Difficult Conversation You've Been Avoiding."  

Communication Skills with Kids
He's going to work on his teaching skills and learn how to better capture kids' attention and communicate effectively with them.  He will be reading the book "The Fabulous Reinvention of Sunday School: Transformational Techniques for Reaching and Teaching Kids."  He will also be getting hands on teaching experience and I will give him coaching and feedback.  New children's ministry leaders should constantly be sharpening their communication skills by learning effective techniques and getting feedback.

I am excited to see how he grows this summer.  If you're new to ministry (or even an old-timer like me), I would encourage you to spend time on these three areas.  It can help you become an effective children's ministry leader.

Your turn.  What other areas would you encourage a new children's ministry leader to focus on?  Share your thoughts with us in the comment section below.

We tend to catoregize people as either a leader or a follower.

But I want to challenge that premise.  I believe you can be a follower without being a leader, but you can't be a leader without being a follower. 

Great leaders are also great followers.  They are willing to take direction, listen to criticism and ask for help.

They have people wiser and more experienced that they go to for advice.  They have people their same age and experience level that they are sharpened by.  They have younger people that help them stay in touch with the culture and current trends.

The first step to being a great leader is being a great follower.  The first step to remaining a great leader is to remain a great follower. 

When I was in middle school, I wanted to improve as a basketball player.  I made the decision to spend my extra basketball time playing with high school players.  They were better than me, stronger than me, taller than me and faster than me.  I definitely wasn't the leader.  But I knew if I was going to improve as a leader on my team, I needed to spend time following.  Following them made me a better leader on the court.

Take a look at who's in your life.  Who you are following is just as important as who you are leading.

There's a small word that makes a big impact when you use it as a leader.

The word is "we."  You see,  the pronouns you use as a leader reflect the focus of your attention.

A leader who constantly uses words like "I" or "me" or "my" is focusing their thoughts, feelings and behaviors inward.
Often this comes from feelings of insecurity or narcissism.

By contrast, a leader who uses words like "we" or "us" is focusing their thoughts, behaviors and feelings on others.  And this is what great leaders do. 

If you'll be intentional about using the word "we" in conversations, meetings, vision casting, lessons and other leadership situations, you'll find people will connect with you and follow your leadership better.

The word "we" is a small but very potent leadership word.  We = team.

When you take a new children's ministry role, you will inevitably be compared to the person who held the position before you.  And according to some of the kids, parents and volunteers, he or she was the greatest children's ministry director ever.

Don't sweat it, even if you feel like the arm on the left side.  It's a normal part of the process when you follow someone.  Here's how to navigate this.

Be ready to be compared to them.
You will be compared to them.  Your personality, leadership style, spiritual gifts, family and abilities will be put on the scales of people's judgement.  Be okay with this.  It's just what happens.

Don't compare yourself to them.
When you feel the tension of comparison, you will naturally begin to do the same thing.  Resist this temptation.  It will either lead you to doubting yourself or to being full of pride...both of which are slippery slopes.  You are not called to run the former person's race...you are called to run your race.  God didn't call you to be a copy of the former person...He called you to be the best version of you that you can be.
 
Expect kids and parents to miss them. 
They will be missed.  And the longer they were there, the more they will be missed.  People who were close to the person will be hurt.  You will feel it and hear it.  And at times, they will take their hurt out on you.  Accept it and give people space to work through it.

Honor them.
When you show honor for the former person, you are not diminishing your influence...you are increasing it.  People will respect you for this.  

Never speak negatively of them.
Don't blame the person for things that are not up to par when you step into the position.  A leader doesn't place blame for where things are.  They provide steps for improvement.

Display an attitude of humility.
Don't be your own press release.  Let God do the promoting. 

Be ready for some volunteers to quit.
It is natural for some volunteers to step down when a leader leaves.  This has nothing to do with you.  When a leader leaves, some people will question if it's time for them to serve somewhere else or step down from serving.  Some will decide it is.  Don't fret it.  God will bring new volunteers.

Be ready for some staff to quit.
If there are other paid or volunteer staff, some of them will usually leave.  It's the same scenario as above.

Give the former leader credit for anything that can be traced to his or her leadership. 
Instead of ignoring the former leader's success, praise them for it.  Taking credit for something you didn't build or create will erode the leadership foundation you are trying to build.  Never forget you are building on the foundation of those who have gone before you. 

For the first 6 months, be cautious about making major changes to things the former leader put in place.
Quick changes the first few months can do more harm than good.  Take the first six months and listen, listen, listen, listen, listen and listen some more.

Realize it's a process.
It takes time to establish yourself as a leader.  Usually you won't hit your full stride in a new position until year 5.  It doesn't matter how many previous years of ministry experience you have.  When you start a new position, in those people's eyes you are starting from scratch.  You have to prove yourself as a leader and that takes time.

Focus on building relationships. 
The volunteers and staff don't care how much you know until they know how much you care.  People won't follow you because of your title...they will follow you because  they love and respect you.  Win their hearts and you will win their loyalty.

Be careful about accepting a position where the former leader is still present.
If the former leader is still involved in the ministry, it will be difficult to lead effectively.  There are exceptions to this, but it is rare.  Before you step into this situation, make sure clear parameters are set.

The floor is yours.  Have you experienced this?  How did you navigate it?  What other advice do you have for someone following the world's greatest children's ministry director?  Share your thoughts with us in the comment section below.