RELEVANT CHILDREN'S MINISTRY

The latest findings from Gallup Polls show that only 24% of Americans now believe the Bible is the literal Word of God and is to be taken literally, word for word.  26% view it as a book of fables, legends, history and moral precepts recorded by man.

This is the first time in 40 years that Biblical literalism has not surpassed Biblical skepticism.  About half of Americans fall in the middle, saying the Bible is the inspired Word of God but that not all of it should be taken literally.

From the mid-1970s through 1984, close to 40% of Americans considered the Bible the literal word of God, but this has been declining ever since, along with a shrinking percentage of self-identified Christians in the U.S.  Meanwhile, the percentage defining the Bible as mere stories has doubled, with much of that change occurring in the past three years.  Still, while Biblical literalism has waned, the vast majority of Americans -- 71% -- continue to view the Bible as a holy document, believing it is at least God-inspired, if not God's own words.

According to a National Study of Youth and Religion, a significant majority of teens still believe in God.  But this has also declined from 84% in 2002 to 78% today.  Sociologist Patricia Snell Herzon says, "A large majority believe that religion is important, but they become less actively involved as they age through adolescence.  Religion is just there in the background.  We describe it as the furniture of their life."

Many teens also have a distorted view of God, embracing what is called "Moralistic Therapeutic Deism."  This consists of beliefs like these:

1. A god exists who created and ordered the world and watches over human life on earth.
2. God wants people to be good, nice, and fair to each other, as taught in the Bible and by most world religions.
3. The central goal of life is to be happy and to feel good about ones self.
 4. God does not need to be particularly involved in one’s life except when God is needed to resolve a problem.
5. Good people go to heaven when they die. 

Other research shows that Americans are five times less likely to pray now as compared to the early 1980's.  Since 2004, fifty percent more Americans say they never pray.  Among Millennials, who are the parents of the next generation, 24% say they never prayed in an entire year.  

These trends should be a wake up call for all of us.  If it continues, an even smaller percentage of the next generation will believe the Bible is the Word of God, much less have a relationship with Him.

First of all, we must teach the kids who are attending our churches, WHY we believe the Bible is the Word of God.  They must know why they believe what they believe or they will more than likely be swept away by a culture that continues to walk farther away from God.  A good place to start is with this apologetics series.

We must also give the next generation a true picture of who God is.  This comes back to the Word of God.  A true picture of who God is comes from a true understanding of what the Bible teaches about God.

We must reach Millennial parents.  If we are to reach the next generation, we must reach those who influence them the most, their parents.  Reach Millennial parents and you will reach Gen Z. 

We must also help kids move beyond just knowing about God to really knowing God.  If He is simply a piece of furniture as stated, they will push Him aside as they grow older.  But if we are able to help them discover a true relationship with a living, true God, they can continue to grow closer to Him and deeper in their faith each year.

Stats can be seem empty and cold.  But what these stats represent are kids, moms, dads and grandparents who desperately need Jesus.  Real kids and families in your neighborhood and mine. 

We can look at these stats and be discouraged or we can renew our prayers, efforts and commitment to reach the next generation like never before.  The Gospel is just as powerful as ever.  One encounter with Jesus can change their life forever.  God is still at work.  He is simply looking for someone to say, "Here am I Lord, send me!"

Let's reach the next generation! 

The Bible truths we speak into a child's life have the potential to change their life forever.  When a child grabs hold of a truth from God's Word and internalizes it, it has the power to altar the trajectory of their life.

Here are twenty Bible truths that you can give to parents to speak into their children's lives and that you can plant in kids' lives at church.

#1 - God loves you.   Unconditionally.  There is nothing you can do to make Him love you any less or more.  (Galatians 2:20)

#2 - Jesus died on the cross so you can be forgiven.  (Romans 5:8)

#3 - God has a special plan for your life.
(Jeremiah 29:11)

#4 - The Bible is the source of truth for you.
(Psalm 119:160)

#5 - God hears and answers when you pray.
(Jeremiah 33:3)

#6 - You are unique.  There's no one else like you.  (Psalm 139:14)

#7 - You can do anything God asks you to do with His power. (Philippians 4:13)

#8 - Jesus will always be with you no matter what you go through. (Psalm 23:4)

#9 - God will give you wisdom to make good choices. (James 1:5)

#10 - You can be strong and brave with God.
(Joshua 1:7)

#11 - Put God first and He will provide for your needs. (Matthew 6:33)

#12 - God can help you overcome any temptation that comes your way. (I Corinthians 10:13)

#13 - God will be faithful to strengthen and protect you. (2 Thessalonians 3:3)

#14 - God is the creator of everything. (Genesis 1:1)

#15 - Jesus is the one and only way to eternal life. (John 14:6)

#16 - When you sin, ask God to forgive you and He will. (1 John 1:9)

#17 - It's better to be a giver than a taker. (Acts 20:35)

#18 - Jesus rose from the dead. (1 Corinthians 15:14-19)

#19 - Jesus wants to be your best friend.
(Proverbs 18:24)

#20 - Obeying God leads to blessings. (Luke 11:28)

This week during one of my quiet times with God, I read this verse and a word jumped out at me.

"The meek shall obtain FRESH joy in the Lord, and the neediest people shall exult in the Holy One of Israel."  Isaiah 29:19

I don't like stale bread or any other kind of stale food.  And I'm sure you don't either  There's no comparison between stale bread and fresh bread, is there?  Don't you love the smell of fresh bread baking in the oven?  Or the taste of fresh, hot rolls with butter dripping down the sides.  Why settle for stale bread when you can have fresh bread?

I wonder how many times we settle for stale ministry?  A stale relationship with God?  A stale vision?  A stale program?  A stale event?  A stale service?

Here are some signs things are stale...

• You talk more about what God has done than what He is doing.

• Attendance is waning.

• You are doing it simply because it's what you've always done. 

• People yawn at the vision. 

• The baptistry is collecting dust. 

• Bible reading is something you endure rather than enjoy.

• The past is dictating the future. 

• Volunteers are serving out of duty rather than delight.

• Few, if any, tears for the lost are seen. 

• Smiles and laughter in the hallways is rare.

• You sense yourself just going through the motions. 

• No one wants to leave their comfort zone. 

We don't have to settle for stale.  God wants to give us fresh joy!  Fresh ministry!  Fresh passion!  Fresh vision!  Fresh anointing!  Fresh spiritual food!  He's already got it baking in the oven for you. He's just waiting for you to ask for it! 

I recently shared 4 Big Reasons Why Kids Walk Away From Church When They Grow Up.  I'd like to dive a little deeper on the first reason - A Shallow Faith Foundation.

Stats show that 78% of "nones" (those who identify with no religion) grew up in church.  This means a high percentage of kids growing up in church are walking away.  But the even bigger issue are those who walk away from their faith completely.  50% of kids who walk away say it's because they no longer believe in God at all.

The root cause of this is a shallow faith and the finger is pointing directly at parents and church leaders.  We have skimmed the surface with doctrinal fluff and left them with no deep roots to survive the faith storms they face in a increasingly humanistic society.

Like never before, it's critical that we teach kids apologetics.  We must help them see why we believe what we believe.  We must ask the hard questions now and let them grapple with it.  It will be too late if they're left to fend for themselves in high school or college with no deep Biblical foundation to stand on.

This month, in our children's ministry, we're doing a series called Pranksters.



We're equipping kids to be able to answer the "pranksters" they will face who tell them the Bible is not God's Word.  We're taking a deep dive on...

• Why we believe the Bible is God's Word and not just written by men.
• Why we believe the Bible contains no errors. 
• Why we believe the Bible is different than other religious books. 
• Why we believe the Bible is for today.

We're looking at the hard questions...even to the point of having the kids work through verses that skeptics say contradict each other.  We want the kids looking at those verses now, when they can discover the right answers, versus looking at them for the first time in a college classroom where their faith can be shattered if they're not prepared.  I urge you to write apologetics into your curriculum.  If we don't, we risk losing the next generation.

We will be making the Pranksters series available to other churches.  If you'd like more information about it, you can contact me at dalehudsoncm2@gmail.com.

Your turn.  The floor is yours.  Do you think it's important to teach kids apologetics?  If so, what steps are you taking to do this?  What other good resources or curriculums are available for this?  Share your comments with us below. 

What does the next generation think about the Bible?  A recent survey of teens by Barna research pulled back the curtains and the findings might surprise you. 

How many own a Bible and read it regularly?  69% personally own a Bible.  44% read the Bible at least 3-4 times a year and 25% read it at least once a week.  3% read it daily.  53% say they wish they read the Bible more.


How much time do they spend reading the Bible?  36% spend 15 to 29 minutes, 22% spend 30 to 44 minutes and 10% spend 45 minutes or longer per sitting.  31% spend less than 15 minutes.


Why are they reading the Bible?  54% say they read the Bible because it brings them closer to God, 12% out of obligation, 8% for comfort, 6% when they are having a problem or need direction, 10% for school and 11% for other reasons.




Do they prefer to use a digital or hard copy of the Bible?  Lots of teens are reading the Bible digitally with 46% engaging with the Bible via their smartphone or cell phone.  But the biggest percentage still read from a hard copy.


Does they consider the Bible sacred literature?  86% choose the Bible as the book that comes to mind when they think of sacred literature or holy books.


Is the Bible a source of hope and guidance for the next generation?  47% strongly agree that the Bible is a source of hope.  35% believe the Bible contains everything a person needs to know to live a meaningful life.


Do they consider the Bible the literal or inspired Word of God?  30% say the Bible is the inspired Word of God with no errors, though some verses are meant to be symbolic.  20% believe the Bible is the actual Word of God and should be taken literally, word for word.  16% say the Bible is the inspired Word of God with some factual or historical errors.  19% say it is just another book of teachings written by men that contains stories and advice.  7% say the Bible is not inspired and simply tells how the writers understood the ways and principles of God.


Do they believe the Bible should have more influence on society?  40% believe the Bible has too little influence on American society.  25% believe the Bible has just the right amount of influence on society, and 17% believe the Bible has too much influence.


Does the Bible influence their political decisions?  33% say the Bible influences their opinion of the candidates running for president.  53% think politics would be positively impacted by increased Bible-reading among the candidates.
David Kinnaman, president of the Barna Broup and director of the study said, “In an increasingly secular culture, the Bible remains a highly regarded and well-read text among the vast majority of American teens - most of whom believe it to be sacred.  And the fact that so many still consider it a source of hope and guidance is reason for great optimism for church leaders and parents alike.  The research also tells us that teens care deeply about the relevance of the Bible to the world in which they inhabit.  The more youth pastors and leaders can make the Bible and its teachings relevant to challenges of today, the more they will simultaneously encourage engagement.”

Author Satterwhite, senior manager at American Bible Society says, "American teens sometimes get a bad rap as being uninterested or even anti-faith.  But the report shows that a majority of America’s teens have respect for and interest in the Bible.  Many teens are recognizing that the Bible speaks to the complete human experience - the struggles and trials and triumphs of life."

Yesterday I had the joy of teaching both elementary services at our new Port St. Lucie campus.  Teaching kids is one of my first loves in children's ministry and I cherish it every time the opportunity arises.

Kids are so open and receptive to God's Word. I truly believe the heart of a child is the most fertile soil you can invest in.  Given the choice between teaching kids and adults, I'd choose teaching kids every time.

After teaching kids for the past 32 years, I still have much room for improvement and growth.  Today's kids are not the kids of the 1980's or even the early 2000's.  I must constantly be evaluating how I am teaching and looking for ways to more effectively connect with kids. 

One way you can do this is to ask yourself some key questions after each lesson you teach. Here are 10 questions to ponder after teaching.

1. Was my lesson grounded in God's Word?  Scripture must be the original source and inspiration for our lesson...it should emanate from God's Word.  Cultural relevance is not the starting point.  Lessons should not be inspired by a movie, trend or the latest fad.  These things should simply be tools to illustrate the truth of God's Word and not visa versa. 

2. Are the kids able to clearly state one key truth they learned?  Can the kids walk out and repeat from memory one, simple key truth that has been embedded in their long term memory.  More about how to do this at this link.

3. Did I help the kids apply the truth to their everyday life?  Information without application = stagnation.  Did I take time to show the kids how they can live out the truth this week.  

4. How many stories did I tell?  Kids (actually, all of us) are captivated by stories.  Jesus knew this and much of His teaching was done through stories. 

5. How many times did the kids look away?  When kids disengage, they look away and it means you lost their attention.  How many times did this happen?  Why did it happen?  How can I tweak those parts of my teaching to keep it from happening?

6. Did I allow the kids to talk and interact?  How much did I lecture?  This is the least effective way to teach.  Did I give the kids spans of time to talk and interact during the lesson?  Here are some ways to improve this.

7. Did I communicate visually?  Today's kids hear with their eyes.  How many opportunities did I give them to hear the lesson by using visual images? 

8. Did I honor the kids' attention span?  I had about 1 minute to talk for every year of their age (maxing out at 5 minutes) before doing something different.  Did I talk longer than that?

9. Did I use simple words that were easy for them to understand?  Did I go over their heads with words like justification, redemption and other complicated Christianese terms?

10. Did I give the kids any next steps coming out of the lesson?  Did they walk out knowing what to do next with what I taught them?  Will I be able to track what they did with it?  Follow up with them? 

Your turn.  The floor is yours.  What are some other questions we should ask ourselves after teaching kids?  Share your comments with everyone in the comment section below.

Studies show the first 3 years of a child's life are some of the most critical.  Children's brains develop more and faster during these early years than any other time in life.

This being said, it is critical that we help children grasp during their first two years that the Bible is God's Word and Jesus is the center of the Bible.

A great way to do this each week is to hand the kids a New Testament and say to them, "This is the Bible...it's God's Word.  The Bible is about Jesus.  Look inside the Bible for Jesus.  He loves you."  We have a sticker of Jesus inside the Bible.  We have the kids open the Bible and look at Jesus while we are saying this.  We got this idea from our friends at Gateway Church in Dallas.

Here is a picture of the kids doing this a few weeks ago in one of our classrooms.


George Barna has reminded us that "In the race to a child's heart, the first one there wins."  Placing the Bible in a 2-year-old's hands and telling them Jesus loves them is one of the ways you can to get to their heart first.

Dear Volunteer,

There's a lot of different things you can give a child...an exciting lesson...a fun game...a quarter to put in the offering...a new Bible...a happy birthday card...candy...a scholarship to camp...Bible knowledge.

But the greatest gift you can give a child is...your presence.  Simply be there.  Week in and week out...show up.  And I mean really show up.  Push aside that task from work that is occupying your mind....push aside your own problems...push aside that text message response...push aside thinking about where you're going for lunch...and be there.  Mind and body.

You see...discipleship doesn't just happen by kids memorizing key Bible verses...even though that's important...discipleship happens through relationship.  The kids in your class need you to know their name...know how things are going at home...know their fears, hopes and dreams...know how they're doing in school.  When you give them the gift of your presence and they know you really care, it will open their heart to receive your spiritual influence.

It does take commitment to give the gift of your presence.  Showing up 10 minutes late and then rushing out as soon as service is out will lesson the potential impact of your gift.  Only serving once a month will diminish the return of your investment.  Standing in the back of the room talking to another adult will shortchange what could be accomplished if you went all in and gave a child your undivided presence.

The good news about this...you don't have to be a Bible scholar...you don't need a great singing voice...you don't have be wealthy...you don't have to cool...you don't have to be the world's greatest children's ministry volunteer...you just simply have to be there. 

Your presence can be a game-changer for a child.  You see...all it takes is one caring volunteer to make the difference in a child's life.  Will you be the one?  Will you give a child your greatest gift?

Complaints.  If you're in children's ministry, you will hear them. 

But how you view the complaints can make a huge difference for your ministry.  If you look at complaints as a gift that someone is giving you to help make the ministry better, it changes your perspective. 

Complaints...no matter how far out there they may seem,  usually contain some level of truth and your ministry can use them to improve.

Here's 10 complaints you may hear at times in children's ministry and how you can use them to make your ministry better.

It's boring.
If a child complains that the ministry is boring...it's probably because it is.  When you hear this, check the energy and excitement level of your ministry.  You may need to infuse some fresh life and energy.

Sit down with a group of kids and ask them what's boring.  Is it the music?  The lesson?  The videos?  The games?  It may be time to change up your format, curriculum, music or approach.  In our upcoming book, If Disney Ran Your Children's Ministry, we dedicate an entire chapter to capturing kid's attention and making church a fun, exciting experience.  

My child doesn't learn anything.
This complaint comes when parents ask their child what they learned and simply get a shrug or "about God" answer.  The solution is to focus your teaching on one key truth for the month.  Have the kids repeat that truth with you at least 6 times each week.  When you hear something once, you only remember 10% of it.  When you hear something 6 times, your retention rate goes up to 90%. 

Then make sure you're sending home a take home page that shows parents what their child learned that day and provides follow-up questions.

My child doesn't have any friends.
Normally this complaint originates from a child who is shy or withdrawn.  Provide opportunities for kids to talk and connect throughout your class time by using icebreakers and other activities that get kids talking and sharing about themselves.  Also place kids in the same small group or classroom each week so they can build relationships.

It's not deep enough.  
This usually comes from a parent who wants to make sure their child has a solid knowledge and understanding of the Bible.  And that's a good thing.  And that doesn't mean you have to sacrifice fun and games to help kids get a solid grasp of God's Word.

Make sure every game, activity, song, etc. is helping teach God's Word.  Everything that happens in the class should point kids to the Bible.

It's also important to have a clear teaching pathway that maps out for parents what their kids will be learning while they are in your ministry.  Showing parents a clear scope and sequence up front will give them confidence in what their child will be learning.

Also help parents understand that "deep" is not only head knowledge, but application as well.  Going deeper means living out what you are learning. 

I already heard that story before.
I remember as a child complaining about this once myself during a Bible lesson.  The reason I remember is because I got in trouble for saying it and was removed from the classroom.  Hey...what can I say...I needed a fresh take on it. 

Keep a list of Bible stories you've taught and don't repeat the same story more than once in a 3 year period (of course...this doesn't include the story of the cross).  By doing this, you'll give kids a broader view of the many, many incredible, true stories found in the Bible.  Better to share that unique, not-as-well-known story than sharing David and Goliath for the 5th time.

There's not enough volunteers.
This complaint will come from all angles.  From other volunteers who are stressed out because they're trying to manage a large class with little help.  From parents who look into a room that has 30 preschoolers and 2 adults.  From an elementary volunteer who has a "small" group of 20 kids.

Volunteers are what makes children's ministry happen.  There is no children's ministry without them.  The simple solution is to build a solid team of volunteers.  I say simple...but it's every ministry's greatest challenge.  But it can be done.  In this post, I share 10 secrets to building a dynamic volunteer team.  We've used these steps to build a team of over 2,600 children's ministry volunteers at our church.  (BTW - we still need a lot more and always will)

It's too babyish. 
This complaint usually comes from older kids who are not being targeted.  When you have a class of kids who are different ages, don't make the mistake of targeting the youngest kids in the room.  When you do this, the older kids will tune out.  Always target the oldest child in the room.  If you have a group of 1-5th graders, make sure the music, lesson, games and activities are geared to hit a 5th grader.  With children, cool rolls downhill.  I talk more about this here.

My baby's diaper didn't get changed.
No parents like to pick up their child and find their diaper is wet.  Make sure you have a plan for your nursery volunteers to check babies' diapers during the service and make sure they are all changed at pick-up time.  It's also a great idea to have stickers that say "I was changed" to place on the diapers.

We never know what's going on.
This complaint is due to lack of communication.  Use many different avenues to communicate with parents.  A parent Facebook page, emails, texts, take home pages and phone calls are just a few of the methods you can use.  Find a good balance though...bombard them and you'll hear the opposite complaint.  Create too much noise and it will get drowned out.

My child hasn't connected with any of the volunteers. 
It's hard for a volunteer to effectively connect with more than 8 kids by himself or herself.  Make sure your volunteer ratios are conducive to volunteers getting to know the kids.  Here are the ratios we follow. 

You can also be intentional about providing icebreakers and activities that allow the volunteers to talk with and get to know the kids. 

Ask volunteers to also be intentional about hanging out with kids during the pre-service time and building relationships with them.  You can also have kids write down their prayer requests each week and then have the volunteers take the requests home to pray for them during the week.

Okay.  The floor is yours.  What other complaints have you heard about children's ministry?  What are some other ways you fix the complaints mentioned above?  We'd love to hear your thoughts and ideas in the comment section below. 

How do you effectively disciple kids?  Does filling their head with Bible facts ensure their faith will grow?  Does having them memorize verses guarantee they will live them out? 

Here's a look at what effective kids' discipleship is and isn't.

If you'd like a copy of this as a .jpg, feel free to email me at dalehudsoncm2@gmail.com.

America is quickly becoming a post-Christian nation.  This means people's personal world views are no longer rooted in the language and assumptions of Christianity.  

A few of the key indicators are the increasing number of religiously unaffiliated, a steady drop in church attendance, the recent Supreme Court decision on same-sex marriage and the growing tension over religious freedoms.  One major finding reveals that from 2013─2015, the number of “post-Christian” Americans rose close to 50 percent.

If you don't think this is the way things are trending, it's probably because you've surrounded yourself with people who think just like you do.  If you get outside the Christian bubble, you'll see that things have changed.  This is not your grandmother's culture and children's ministries that want to thrive cannot conduct business as they have in the past.

"Family" in post-Christian America comes in all shapes and sizes.  Family used to mean a husband and wife with two kids and a white picket fence.  But today, the "word" family means single-parent families, blended families, parents who are cohabiting, grandparents raising their grandchildren and a host of other family situations.  If you want to reach families in post-Christian America, you must be prepared to minister to all kinds of families.

Back to the basics.  In post-Christian America, kids and parents have no Biblical knowledge base to draw from.  Words like "justification" and "redemption" and "sanctification" and "washed in the blood" are like a foreign language to them.  Adam?  Eve?  Noah?  Daniel?  Matthew?  Mark?  They've never heard of them.  You must start with the basics and build from there.

Church attendance.  People used to attend church because it was what they were supposed to do.  It was part of the culture.  But not in post-Christian America.  Less and less people are attending church and those who do are attending less frequently.  The days of people being there every time the doors are open has become a thing of the past.  We must find ways to make church so irresistible that families will line up to get inside.

Allow people to belong before they believe.  In post-Christian America, kids and families long to belong.  They are searching for meaningful relationships and community.  Children's ministries that give people the space to come and belong to their community before believing, can be effective.  Once they find a place to belong, they will see that what we have is real and believe.  After they believe, they will begin to behave as they are transformed into the image of Christ through the indwelling of the Holy Spirit.

Compassion.  In a post-Christian world, we will not win kids and families to Christ through "proving" that the Bible is true or by "winning a political argument" or by "convincing them that Jesus rose from the dead."  We will win them by showing them true compassion and love.  We will win them with our heart...not with our head.

Concluding thoughts...

What a great time to be the light!  The darker the night, the brighter the light can be seen!  Living in a post-Christian America is not the time to build a bunker and hold out til Jesus comes back.  It's time to let the light of Jesus shine brighter than ever.

God is still drawing kids and families to Himself, restoring marriages, bringing hope to people who have no hope and filling His house with people who are hungry for His presence.  It's a great time to be in Children and Family Ministry!  God wants to use you like never before!  Simply make yourself available to Him and watch what He does in you and through you in the next 6 months! 

Conflict is a familiar happening in children's ministry.  You've probably heard the following.

"He called me a name!"

"She won't let me play with them!"

"He's not supposed to be in our group!"

"She took my crayons!"

"He's sitting in my seat and won't get up!"

When conflict happens, here's how to resolve it like a pro.

Take the children who are having the conflict to a place where you can have a private conversation with them.  Make sure there is another adult with you.  (never be alone with a child) 

Have the kids cool down.  Ask them to take a few deep breaths and take the deep breaths with them.  This helps release some of the stress and tension they are feeling. 

Have one of the children share why he or she is upset with the other person. 

• If they child starts sharing with you, re-direct them to share with the other child.  (Example - If the child says "she wouldn't let me play with..."  - stop the child and have him or her tell the other child - you wouldn't let me play with...)  This is teaching them to use direct communication which follows Matthew 18.   

• Have the other child then rehearse back to the child what he or she said.  (Example - "You said I wouldn't let you play with us.") 

• Next let the other child talk and share about why he or she acted that way.  (Example - I didn't let you play with us because I hadn't seen her in 3 weeks and wanted to spend time with her.) 

• Give both kids a last opportunity to share their thoughts or view.  

• Ask them how they can come to an agreement.  The goal is for them to come up with a mutual understanding.  If they cannot, then you can step in and guide the conversation as needed.

• Once they've come to an agreement, encourage them to forgive each other if it is needed. 

• Make it a teachable moment.  (If it involves forgiveness - share with them what God's Word says about it.  If it involves treating others with respect - share with them what God's Word says about it.)

• Pray with them.

• Once they are back in the environment, observe and see if the conflict has been completely resolved.  Is the child including the other child play in the group now?  Are they getting along?

• If the incident involved physical conflict (hitting, pushing, etc.), then fill out an incident report and bring it to the attention of the parents when they come to pick-up.  Do this with the parents separately.   

When we teach kids how to Biblically resolve conflict, we are not only helping them in the moment, but for the rest of their lives.  Knowing how to resolve conflict is a skill they can use at school, at home and in the work place as adults.

Your turn.  The floor is yours.  What other tips do you have for helping kids resolve conflict?  Share with us in the comment section below.

I believe the number one way a children's ministry grows is word of mouth.

When a parent finds a place that takes safety and security very seriously, they will tell other families.

When a parent sees his or her child come home from church excited, they will tell other families.

When a parent discovers a church that makes children's ministry a top priority, they will tell other families.

When a new mother walks into a nursery that is calm and loving, she will tell her friends.

When a parent asks his or her child what they learned today at church and the child knows....they will tell their friends.

When a parent walks into a children's area that is clean and well prepared, they will tell other families.

"Good gossip" will grow your children's ministry while "negative" gossip will have the opposite effect.

How do you know if you're creating good gossip?  You will consistently have new families walk through the door who heard about the ministry from another family. 

People will talk...what they say about your children's ministry depends on what you give them to talk about.

I recently heard a pastor say, "We do not live in a Christian nation.  We live in a nation that has some Christians in it...but it is not a Christian nation."

Whether you agree with that statement or not, it is evident that we are quickly sliding away from being able to classify ourselves as a "Christian nation."  Yes...it still says "In God We Trust" on our currency, but fewer people seem to actually be trusting in God. 

Consider this...

• 4% do not believe in God
• 8% identify as agnostic or atheist
• 13% disagree that faith is important
• 18% do not pray
• 27% have never made a commitment to Jesus
• 29% disagree that the Bible is accurate
• 32% have not donated money to a church
• 33% have not attended a church
• 41% agree that Jesus committed sins
• 47% do not feel a responsibility to share their faith
• 57% have not read the Bible
• 79% have not volunteered at church
• 81% have not attended "Sunday School"
• 81% have not attended a small group
• 89% have not participated in a house church

The startling realization is that each generation is becoming more post-Christian.  The Mosaics (ages 18-28) are 48% post-Christian compared to the Busters (ages 29-47) who are at 40%.  If this pattern continues, the generation of kids we are trying to reach will be even more post-Christian.

Don't let these stats depress you.  God is still at work...in an amazing way.  Some of the greatest churches in the history of our nation are being built right now and they are doing it by reaching post-Christians.

Here's what it takes...

Authenticity
Unbelievers want to see Christians that are genuine.  Not perfect...but with a sincere faith that translates into every area of their lives.  Nothing validates a person's faith more than living it out every day.

Attractiveness
No one wants to give their lives to misery.  When believers look like they were baptized in pickle juice, who would want to be a Christ-follower?  We must let the joy of the Lord rule our hearts so people can see it in our faces and be attracted to it.

Anointing
The Holy Spirit is the one who convicts of sin and draws people to the Father.  As we spend time with God, His anointing falls upon our lives and empowers us to reach people.  Take a look at some of the churches that are effectively reaching people and you will see that it's not because of their talent or cool music or hip pastors...it's because of the anointing of God resting upon their ministry.  Above  all else, beg...beg...beg...beg...beg...beg for God to anoint your ministry.

Acceptance
Are you willing to accept people where they are?  Can alcoholics, adulterers, people living together, homosexuals, drug addicts, agnostics, prostitutes, thieves, etc. come and feel loved and welcome?  Will you give them time and space to belong before they believe?  Notice I didn't say "approve" but "accept."  There is a difference.

Acquainting
In past generations, the public in general had some knowledge of the Bible.  But as we move farther and farther away from Christianity as a nation, you will find that people have little to no knowledge of God's Word.  You will have to start at square one, teaching them who God is and how He sent His Son, Jesus, to redeem us.

As the culture around us gets darker with each passing generation, the brighter the light of the Gospel can shine.  The Gospel is what changes lives.  It is the hope for the world!  Our greatest opportunities to share the Gospel and reach people area ahead.

The Post-Christian Generation...yes...you can reach them.  The Gospel still works if we will acquaint people with it.

A few weeks ago, a girl who had been brought to our church by a friend, told us she is an atheist.  She was very clear that she did not believe in God or what we were teaching.

This is not as uncommon as you might think.  Atheism is on the rise...even making it's way into the hearts of kids.  This is due to four primary factors. 

#1 - Parental influence.  The number one influence in a child's life is his or her parents.  1 out of every 4 unchurched adults are agnostics or atheists.  As the percentage of adults who are atheists goes up, the natural outcome is the percentage of children who are atheists goes up.  Add to that the fact that the largest percentage of atheists are under 30.  These young adults are and will be the parents of the next generation of kids.  As goes parents...so goes children.

#2 - Rejection of the Bible.  Interesting enough, a large percentage of skeptics had some regular exposure to the Bible as children.  But at some point in their life they have chosen to reject it as God's Word and not submit to its authority in their lives.

#3 - Lack of trust for the local church.  Interesting statistic - 2/3rds of skeptics have attended church in the past...most for an extended period of time.  But church scandals and abuse has turned many of them away from belief in God.  Since the church is a tangible expression of faith for most people, when it becomes overtly flawed, it flaws their faith.

#4 - Cultural reinforcement of a secular worldview.  This is a huge factor.  Humanism and postmodernism engulfs many children through media, school, celebrities, friends, social media, political messaging and more.  The website www.kidswithoutGod.com is a great example of kids being targeted by atheists.
 
Recently, the area of the country I minister in was voted the #1 "never-churched" area in the country. We are surrounded by kids and families who are not believers...and so are you.   

So how are we going to reach them?

We must keep our focus outward.  The issue is not how many people attend your church.  The issue is how many people in your area do not attend church anywhere.  That's the number that should keep us up at night.  Yes...we have a lot of people attending our church...but it's a drop in the bucket when you consider the 1.5 million people in our area who do not attend church anywhere.  If we are going to reach unbelievers, we must focus our attention on the Great Commission.  The Gospel still works, if we will work the Gospel. 

Our campus in New York City actually meets in an atheist church building...right across the street from Central Park.  Yes...you read it right...an atheist "church."  I guess they get together to talk about "nothing."  Anyways, they meet on the 3rd floor and we meet on the 2nd floor.  Cool thing...several atheist have accidentally walked into our service, stayed and came to faith in Jesus! 

We must reach parents.  As previously stated...atheist kids come from atheist parents.  Reach parents and you will reach their kids.  I talk more about how to reach parents in this previous post.

We must equip our kids to share their faith and bring their unbelieving friends to church.  Kids can reach kids who are unbelievers.  Just this past weekend, an elementary boy was baptized who had been brought to church by his friend.  Kids can reach kids if we give them the tools they need.

We must pray.  Prayer can melt a heart of unbelief through the power of the Holy Spirit.  I have see Him do it.  I am thinking right now of three people who were hardened atheists that I have personally seen come to faith in Christ.  

Will you join me in praying for the little girl I told you about at the beginning of this post?  Will you join me in praying for kids and families across the country and around the world who do not believe in Jesus yet?

Yes...kid atheists exists...I've met them...and yes...they can be reached.

I've read and taught the story of the five loaves and 2 fish many times.  But as I was reading it again last week something jumped out at me that I had never noticed before.

Another of His disciples, Andrew, Simon Peter’s brother, spoke up, “Here is a boy with five small barley loaves and two small fish, but how far will they go among so many?” John 6:8-9

The bread and fish were small.  Small means small in the Bible.  The child didn't have a five pound bass.  It was a small fish.  And we know that Jesus took that small fish and did a big miracle.  

From this we learn that...

• Jesus is looking for people with small talent that will make a big surrender.  Jesus is more concerned with the size of the surrender than He is with the size of the talent.
  

• Small Talent + Big Surrender = Big Miracles.  He loves to use the small to accomplish the miraculous.  This results in the glory going to God instead of man.
  

• Jesus will continue to use those who stay small after they see Him do big things with what they've surrendered.  In order to continue to be used by God, you must remember it is His ability and not yours that causes the miracles to happen.
  

Do you feel like what you have to offer Jesus is small?  That's just what He's looking for.  Place it in His hands and watch Him do the miraculous.

You think you know everything about parenting until you have kids and then you realize you don't know nearly as much as you thought you did.

Parenting is one of life's most rewarding...but challenging roles.  And if you're in children's ministry, you're not only pouring into your own kids, but into other people's kids as well.

And even more importantly, you should be pouring into the parents of the kids in your ministry.  Parents hold the most critical components of kids growing up to love Jesus.

Sounds like a lot of responsibility on our part, doesn't it?  How do we help kids grow up to love Jesus?  How can we equip parents to lead their kids spiritually?

My two sons are both adults now.  In spite of all the mistakes I've made along the way, they love Jesus and His church.  I don't have all the answers...but who does?  I have, however, seen some commonalities in parents whose kids grow up to love Jesus.

Let me preface this list by saying it does not override a child's free will.  Each person must decide for themselves whether or not they will follow Jesus.  God doesn't have any grandchildren.  I know what you're thinking, "But what about Proverbs 22:6 - Train up a child in the way he should go and he will not depart from it."  You can read more about my thoughts on this verse in this post.

All that being said, we can equip parents to create homes that are fertile soil for kids to grow in their faith.  Here's 10 keys to raising great kids who love Jesus.

Walk the Talk
You've probably heard the saying, "Your kids can't hear what you are saying, because what you are doing is speaking so loudly."  Isn't that true?  Parents who raise kids that love Jesus don't live a double life.  This doesn't mean they are perfect, but it does mean they follow Jesus every day of the week.  They practice what they preach.  They lead by example.  

Affirm the Gift
They see the gifts that God has placed in their child and they affirm those gifts.  The words "I believe in you" echo in their child's ears.  The move beyond calling their child "out" to calling their child "up" to be all that God intended them to be.  Kids who don't receive affirmation often go looking for it in all the wrong places.

Read the Word
Kids who grow up to love Jesus have parents whose Bibles are worn out...and it's not from sitting in the hot sun on the car dashboard all week...waiting to be grabbed next Sunday upon arriving at church.  It's from being read each day...in front of the kids and with the kids.

Eat the Meal
Research shows that children who have dinner with their parents are less likely to drink, smoke, do drugs, get pregnant, become depressed or develop eating disorders.  They also do better socially and academically...and I believe spiritually.  Why?  Because a family meal is much more than eating.  It's a time to pray, communicate, connect, mentor and disciple.

Serve the People
When a child sees his or her parents serving others, it makes a huge impact spiritually in the child's life.  Serving is a key component of discipleship and kids who grow up to love Jesus have families that serve.  Kids' faith becomes animated as they watch their parents serve and begin serving themselves.  One of the best things parents can do for their kids spiritually is to get them serving others.

Love the Spouse
The best parenting tool is a happy marriage.  Solid marriages create solid kids.  Parents who love each other have kids who love Jesus.

Pray the Prayers
Prayer is a vital part of kids growing up to love Jesus.  Kids who grow up to love Jesus have parents who pray with them.  Kids who grow up to love Jesus have parents who pray for them.  Here's an example of a prayer calendar we created for parents.

Set the Boundaries
Children who stray the most are kids whose parents didn't set reasonable rules and boundaries.  Parents who are consistent in enforcing set rules and boundaries actually end up becoming very close to their children.  Of course, this doesn't mean over-doing rules or having rules without relationship. 

Monitor the Friends
Peers are a huge part of whether or not kids grow up to love Jesus.  You become like the people you spend the most time with.  Parents whose kids grow up to love Jesus know who their kids are friends with and make sure they have good influences around them.

Cultivate the Gratitude
A sense of entitlement is the opposite of the heart of Jesus.  Parents whose kids grow up to follow Him help their kids cultivate an attitude of gratitude.  Thanksgiving is not just a day of the year to eat turkey and watch football in their home...it's a way of life.

The floor is yours.  What are some other keys to raising great kids who love Jesus?  Share your thoughts with us in the comment section below.

Frozen...it's the highest grossing animated film of all times.

It is also the most downloaded kid movie from iTunes.  You can often hear kids singing, "Let it Go...Let it Go...Let it Go!"  Last October,  you could see kids in Elsa, Anna and Kristoff costumes at fall festivals across the country.

Disney, as usual, used their expertise in marketing and you find the characters images on clothes, toys, school supplies, lunch boxes and more.

Let's stop and think about why Frozen has resonated with kids so well.  What makes them want to watch it over and over?  What's the appeal?  Why do they connect with the characters so well?  What can we learn from this?

Recently two psychologists, Yalda Uhls with Common Sense Media and Maryam Kia-Keating with the University of California shared with CNN why Frozen was such a big hit with kids.

Do lead by serving.
Don't try to lead by a title.

Do make church fun for kids.
Don't make church boring for kids.

Do create environments that have kids dragging their parents to church.
Don't create environments that cause parents to have to drag their kids to church.

Do teach life application.
Don't teach information without life application.

Do place new volunteers where they need to be.
Don't place new volunteers where you need them to be.

Do listen.
Don't do all the talking.

Do let kids move.
Don't expect kids to sit still and be quiet for more than 5 minutes.

Do be productive.
Don't be busy, but not productive.

Do background checks on all volunteers before they start serving.
Don't ever let anyone be alone with a child.

Do treat pre-teens their age.
Don't talk to pre-teens like they are little kids.

Do partner with other ministries in your church.
Don't make children's ministry a silo.

Do equip parents to be the primary spiritual leaders of their children.
Don't separate what happens at church from what happens at home.

Do go the second mile to give first-time guests a great experience.
Don't make new guests wait in line.

Do keep your children's ministry space clean and tidy.
Don't let your children's ministry get cluttered.

Do look through the eyes of a child when decorating your kids' rooms.
Don't put kids in rooms that were designed for adults.

Do make your lessons interactive and participatory.
Don't lecture kids.

Do treat kids like they are living in 2015.
Don't treat kids like they are living in 1980.

Do use the ministry to build your volunteers.
Don't use volunteers to build the ministry.

Do put your family before your ministry.
Don't put your ministry before your family.

Do spend just as much time learning to lead adults as you do kids.
Don't put all your focus on the kids.

Do build a volunteer team through vision.
Don't try to build a volunteer team through need.

Do learn how to manage conflict and bring resolution.
Don't run from hard conversations.

Do be yourself.
Don't try to be a copy of someone else.

Do see complaints as a gift that you can use to make the ministry better.
Don't turn a deaf ear to complainers.

Do say "thank you" every week to your volunteers.
Don't take your volunteers for granted.

Do spend time with God.
Don't get so busy working for God that you don't have time to spend with God.

Do use breath mints.
Don't knock new families out with your breath.

Do read and read and read.
Don't stop growing.

Do help kids see the Bible as a love letter.
Don't cause kids to see the Bible primarily as a rule book.

Do keep going.
Don't quit.

The floor is yours.  What are some other do's and don'ts of children's ministry?  Share them with us in the comment section below.

Great children's ministries are great storytellers.  When it comes to capturing kids' attention and communicating truth...story rules.

The Bible contains the greatest stories ever told.  And the greatest stories deserve the greatest presentation.  Want to up the storytelling skills of your children's ministry?  Here's 5 tips for sharing compelling Bible stories.

Tip #1 - Immediately jump into the story and share the truth connection afterwards.  
Instead of saying, "Let me tell you a story that will illustrate God's love," dive right into the story and pull them in.  Then follow the story with how it illustrates or applies to the truth you want to share.  Taking this approach will help you grab kids' attention from the get go and then cement the truth into their hearts through application.

Tip #2 - Build their anticipation.  
Start with some energy, but don't bring it all at once.  Let the energy and anticipation build as you tell the story.  The farther the story goes, the more on the edge of their seat they should be.  A good way to do this is to build your voice and energy level as the story goes along.  An example would be the story of David and Goliath.  When David arrives at the battle scene, your energy level would be at a 3.  When Goliath makes his challenge, your energy level would be at a 5.  When David walks out and faces Goliath on the battlefield, your energy level would be at 7.  When David kills Goliath, your energy level would be at a 10. 

Tip #3 - Eye contact. 
Learn to make good eye contact while you are telling the story.  Do your best to make brief eye contact with every child in the room over the course of your story.  This will draw the kids to you.

Tip #4 - Give them the silent treatment. 
Strategic pauses emphasizes what you just said or what you about to say. 

Tip #5 - Up and down. 
Vary your voice level.  There should be times when you are whispering and times when you are shouting.  Don't be monotone.  Monotone speaking will put kids in a daze.

What other tips do you have for teaching Bible stories?

What has worked well for you?

Share your thoughts with us in the comment section below.